I relapsed again. I was sober for 14 years and can’t get it together. Had 1 yesterday and drank the next day. It’s like I enjoy to anxiety. I am diagnosed with bipolar disorder and the meds make it so hard but they are def an improvement than when I am off of them. I’m tired
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Meant to say I had 1 year sober and drank the next day 
Hi Lynn! This is okay!! Reaching out for help is the sign that you're still wanting to fight for your sobriety which is wonderful. Don't be too hard on yourself. Along with your medicine, do you also go to therapy? I have been going for a little over a year and my therapist has taught me many tools to understand my mood disorder and how to cope without leaning on alcohol. Just a thought! Stay strong! 
I am also bipolar. Finally got on lexapro and it has made a world of difference for me. It completely stabilized my mood swings. And hey… be kind to yourself. You had a slip, it happens. You obviously want to stay sober. You didn’t lose all the progress you have made over the last year…congrats to that btw that’s outstanding… just get back to it. You owned it, know it wasn’t what you wanted and now you can get past it.
Step 1