I think I'm lonely

Recovery
#1

I have been alone for a long time because I was too scared of people

I feel like it's too hard to make good people and since I hold on I might end up a complete mess which is why hoping this might be more compassionate community.

There are risks with everything.
I don't know how I got so careful about everything.
It's probably once I started understanding that I have feelings.
Or maybe after enough experiences that hurt.
And also the fear of being emotionally shoved around which would create more desire to use.
Substances just suck because they make life so much harder.

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#2

Lonely suck!

1 Like
#3

Fear... it's a trauma response mechanism. It helps us more than it hurts us ideally. When we use and in turn begin to lose our natural coping mechanisms and replace them with chemical ones, we become weaker in a sense. Less able to face fears proactively and constructively.

Yeah, it sucks. Isolation can serve excellent purposes in recovery and can be achieved and even enjoyed without loneliness. It just takes practice and patience. I'm in a house full of people RN, feeling alone, bout to head to the park and hang with my higher power a while...

Welcome. I hope you find all that you ate.looking for and don't be afraid to ask or speak up if not. I know we try and we mean we'll but we are a beautiful mess at our best.

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#4

I have found some solace in giving myself the care and love I thought I wanted or needed from others. Being gentle with myself and practicing “being still” so I could reconnect with the “self” that I drowned out with alcohol.

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#5

Sadly, being lonely was a major trigger for my drinking. I would be into the beer at 0730 in the morning and heading to the beer store by 1030. It was a vicious cycle that landed me in hospital. I'm so grateful to be alive and sober.

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#6

Congratulations! You are alive!
We are!
Everybody's substance story is different.
Nice to be in a place where we can just be real.
Nobody's perfect.
Thank you for responding

#7

Thank you so much Melanie. The days are good and the nights are hard.
Just responding as I am now and things are good now.
I appreciate your compassion

#8

I completely agree with the loss of coping mechanisms and the greater insecurity it gives us.
Excuse me I'm just learning this app and I'm going a little bit slow

#9

I like the thought on isolation and serving for recovery.
I have always been alone and I'm the weirdest drinker/user on earth.
Nobody will intervene or admit me to anything because they don't believe that I have a problem but I do.
And I think it really does boil down to love and support.
To feeling accepted and honest about ourselves.
So we have some problems...
Big deal... It's not like we're killing ppl!
We are just killing ourselves
In service for everyone else
... At least that's my story