I think my addiction is really confused

Recovery
#1

I think my addiction is really confused. I seem to have two problems that are opposite of other stories I hear.

  1. I’m feeling way LESS feelings after quitting drinking. Drunk me at least had the ability to cry and be vulnerable and feel my feelings. Sober me is a brick wall.
  2. I’m not very triggered by sadness, anger, hopelessness, etc but I’m MAJORLY triggered by happiness. When the suns out and I’m feeling optimistic for my future and the feel-good-chemicals are naturally flowing? That’s when I struggle the absolute hardest. Like I get worried if I’m happy and relaxed and enjoying life because that’s what has caused me to relapse before.

How do I patiently explain to alcoholic-me that she’s gotten it backwards?

5 Likes
#2

Lol. That darn brain again. Just won’t behave. Trust me, the longer you stay sober the more those pent up feelings will come. It’s the pink cloud syndrome. When it pops, you’ll have more feelings than you can handle. That’s when the foundation you are building now will come in handy. Just be grateful you are becoming a new you and don’t sweat the little things. Easy does it as they say. We get sober and do the over analyze thing constantly. Do a gratitude list and keep it handy. Use it daily. Those tears are on the way.

#3

I was like this as well and with therapy I am actually starting to feel my feelings again but sober
Now that I am sober I am able to sit with them and “ name them to tame them “ it is a lot more work than I thought it would be but it is worth it and I am so grateful every day that I am sober - easy does it and give yourself grace :heartpulse: