Please don’t take in negative comments. This is between you and booze-no one else. You can do it.
2 Likes
I don't share about it much. I haven't drank around any of my family or kids since 2005. When I make the conscious decision I find it is best to get stronger spiritually and grounded but even then I just show by example. My recovery is my business. I'm sorry he was negative. If he was drinking it was probably just a flippant comment. Don't let anything derail you! 
My pops asked: "Are you okay?"
I said "No, I'm not"
He simply walked away outside and shut the door to smoke a cigarette.
He is probably projecting his own inability to stop drinking on to you. It sounds like he can’t stop, and that might be impacting his attitude and statement. Show him you can do it!
2 Likes
Believe in yourself ! No matter what anyone says believe in yourself and don’t stop you can do it and you really will then you’ll show yourself and anyone else how long it lasts . You got this I believe in you
You are doing great! You got this.
Alcoholics let people down. It's a fact. We do it over and over and over again. So when we decide to get our lives squared away for the 100th time, we have to understand why, and accept that there are going to be skeptical, it's not healthy, but it's life. This is a normal part of healing on both sides unfortunately.
You must remember that people, especially spiteful people, will always look for an opportunity to exploit your shortcomings. If he's seen you stumble in getting sober before - he's using his past experiences to predict the future. People said similar things to me in the past too and they weren't necessarily wrong.. I stumbled a lot trying to get back on my own two feet and into sobriety. I wish I had some magical words that make intolerance not sting or suck, but there isn't any really. Because difficult days and difficult people will still be on your path. Maybe even more so now that you don't have a crutch to numb yourself to the reactions that sting. Don't get sober for them. Get sober because it's a life you want and value. And don't do it out of spite - or else people will find other areas for you to fall and use those against you. I guess what it really boils down to is this: don't engage with negativity because you feel sniped at... That's the alcoholic in you wanting confirmation that he still has scores in your mind to settle. Learn to let it go and reduce your level of engagement with negative people. Try to figure out why they feel miserable and replace resentment with empathy and understanding. It doesn't mean you're trying to find an avenue of forgiveness every time. It simply just gives you a chance to try to understand why these people may act and think as they do, which helps put things into perspective for you.
People are not going to believe you when you say you’re getting cleaned because we probably said it all the time i did so don’t worry about what they think just do what you need to do you don’t owe anybody any explanation you owe it to yourself
Melissa - you are right you can’t change how your Dad or anyone what they think about what your doing - it’s about you and only you. Live one day at a time and pat yourself on the back fir taking the first step towards recovery.. you got this!
It’s easier to predict someone’s failure than it is to actually help out and make a difference.
I’m so sorry you have been let down and not supported by those who should be your strongest supporters. It is so incredibly hard to make people who have never been addicted what kind of pull these substances have on an addict. It’s like nothing else I have ever felt or gone through. I wouldn’t wish addiction, and all the horrible things that come with it, on my worst enemy. But I believe in you and even if this time is not successful it matters that you keep trying and not give up!
You do it for you and your future, I got up this morning and a angle gave me wisdom, its this ,life is simple, you where born ,your here now, you will die, so..... enjoy the moments of quiet, and learn from tge moments of pain..it will all be ok..
My roommate said to me when I got sober: “if and when you mess up again I’m not going to help you anymore”. That hurt me a lot. I understand why they might feel that way but this is the FIRST time I’ve gotten sober. Really unfair to make a statement like that. And I would have nowhere else to go if they kicked me out. I’d be in a shelter. Not what I’m trying to do right now so I understand how negative comments can hurt. Be strong! You focus on you and your recovery. Prove to others you are stronger than an addiction 
Hey girl I'm sorry your dad is saying and doing, exactly what you're trying to quit. You made a few great baby steps.
First u admitted you're powerless over a substance, then you totally want this and that is key, and then reached out for help. If you continue on this path, I could see you going up from here, and probably one day helping another alcoholic. Don't take on too much all at once, sometimes one minute at a time, not even look at a full day until it's done, and you've accomplished it. I would suggest if u haven't done it yet, get your support group like a sponsor you can have as a guide, find where meetings are or online, find friends who are sober and clean that way you won't feel left out and alone, and keep your faith in your Higher Power...ALWAYS!
1 Like
I so appreciate all of your kind words of wisdom! I have gained so much in just under a week in sobriety, this really is a tribe. I’m going to focus on the internal work and keep those who support me close and those who are weary can just see for themselves over time💕 thank you my tribe, much love and support to you all in your own journeys
2 Likes
That’s why we need to go to a lot of meetings.to help us with these things in life.and meet lots of people .and a sponsor and the steps .I got sober at 26 years old .now I am 61 .35 years. Aa