My drinking has been a problem and last night I almost did something I can’t take back and the only reason I am still here is because my wife kicked me before I pulled the trigger and now there is a bullet hole in our master bedroom ceiling and I’m not quite sure what made me want to exit so bad at that time and I don’t think it’s healthy that I was that willing to quit I think I need some counseling
5 months ago, in a blackout I put a gun to my head intent on killing myself but I wussed out. I would have never done this had I not been drunk. Get your a$$ in a program (AA) now, and start clearing away the bull$hit and rebuilding. Stop waiting.
Thank you for reaching out I’m not sure what it was that was eating at me so hard but I gotta figure it out I’m gonna be going to our AA out here in Yuma and see if there’s someway I can fix my actions before it gets out of hand again
Yeah, bud. Get medicated. Get into a rehab facility to detox and give the meds the time they need in order to work.
Share everything with your therapist. Everything. If you hold the big bad stuff back, sobriety will remain elusive.
Dive into whatever recovery programs you can find, not just AA. Get all the knowledge, tools, tips, tricks, etc. that you can find.
I wasn't suicidal, but I had no hope, and I was just waiting to die. Asking for help is a very hard thing to do.
You can get better.
Hit me with a friend request if you wanna talk.
The "some way" is to get sober and get a support group. Look, I am a hardcore atheist. 100% never changing my mind in that. AA is FULL of God nonsense, but, the support system, the self contemplation in a way to fix my brain instead of trying to selfishly gain is working for me. Give it a chance, keep going. Go every night for a month. Make friends. Get better. Feel better. Next time you pull the trigger, you might end up killing someone besides yourself or putting a dent in your wall, ya know?
It would be a good idea to get any guns out of your reach, a friends house etc. Three friends of mine have done that over the years, all while drunk. They left behind devastated loved ones.
You need to get to a meeting asap and start calling people. I know exactly what you’re going through.. I felt trapped like there was no way out.. I was also ready to end it all. I had to surrender and ask god for guidance.. that was the only thing that I had the power to do to escape that darkness. Please get ahold of me or someone in the program if you feel like drinking or picking up that gun again