I thought I could handle it. My dad who I’m on very bad terms with and avoid talking to at all costs sent me a bottle of my ultimate trigger alcohol and since then it’s been a downward spiral. I drink almost every single day. On my work weekends, I’ve turned to day drinking. I don’t know what to do. I know I should probably stop. My roommate hates alcohol and doesn’t even want me having it in the apartment, so now I’m drinking out on the streets. I almost got hit by a car the other night. I want to practice harm reduction at the very least but I don’t even have a safe space to do that. I can but it now, whenever I want. It’s horrible. And I don’t even have the opportunity to drink socially like I feel I should be able to and at least try to form a healthy relationship with alcohol for my age. I’m just in a miserable situation and trying to keep myself alive but it gets so hard sometimes. Alcohol is ultimately keeping me alive right now but is also making things so much worse. I don’t even think it’s worth it. I’m tired of blacking out and tired of waking up for work at 5am hungover. But once I’m off work, I just drink the rest of my day away and make so many excuses for myself. I’ve been to the ER twice in the span of a month since December from drinking and I can’t keep fücking doing this.
I want to call an ambulance tonight, I want to drink more, but I have work tomorrow and I’m training to be a manager after a month of working where I do. I can’t fück this up. I can barely afford to live, and I know I’m going to be back on the streets if I keep fücking myself over like this and let it get in the way of my responsibilities like I have in the past. I just had a safety net up until now.
Hey Scot, clearly you are asking for help with this post and know that alcohol is beginning to cause you more harm than good. You are still young enough to not have to go down the rabbit whole of alcoholism. Going cold turkey is going to suck , but that is an extreme way of getting through it along with attending A.A meetings with an older group that is willing to in part wisdom to you with their experience with alcohol and also you will gain an A.A family. I have sent you a friend request so that you can message me anytime you get the craving or urge to want to drink. So that you may have the fighting chance to beat your craving and over all this horrible disease. Please take care of yourself, stop drinking on the streets and go to a meeting before you lose control. God bless and we'll be in touch. 
This may not be the response you are seeking. But I know several people who got sober very young. There is no age limit to our disease. You can’t turn a pickle back into a cucumber. I’m js….