I’ve tried AA a bunch of times , everyone tells me that the ONLY thing that works … well idk because I don’t like big groups of people … don’t like speaking in front of a bunch of people … I’ve tried it and instantly get anxiety ….. so AA isn’t for everyone … gotta be other things that are better for me
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Aa seems very exclusive...I have been really into it and I have relapsed so many times that the ppl in aa your first couple meetings tell you that you are the most important person there and will do anything for you and give you rides because I don't have a license but if you can't get a ride to one meeting they kinda shun you and avoid you
92 % of us are anxious about public
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Speaking
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There are online meetings and platforms that are a less nerving format. SMART Recovery is one I will always stand by. If you have heard of it, Google smart recovery, check out their website, download the app and find a meeting to attend whether online or local. If you remain committed to finding a format that works for you, I believe you will.
Celebrate Recovery is a faith based group that tends to be on a smaller, more intimate scale. This is where I currently attend as I don't dig NA and I desire in-person meets.
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It’s not for everyone, and it does not have a monopoly on sobriety.
I will say I didn’t like any of that stuff about AA either.
But, I didn’t like the way my life was going even more.
Keep trying to find what works for you to stay sober and content. It’s better than the alternative.
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Hey Joe, I’m sure there are many paths that work. Just one thing though, an overwhelming majority of people who walk into AA hate big groups and hate talking in front of them. Myself being one of them. Part of the process is dealing with being uncomfortable. Doing things we avoided in the past. Dealing with anxieties and emotions we have been numbing with alcohol and drugs. I also know AA seems clickish, but give it a chance. Stick with it a few weeks or try another meeting. They are all there for the same reasons and they do care more than you can imagine.
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Checkout the book Alan Carr's quit drinking without willpower and see what you think. It changed my life.
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Excuses…can always be found when not wanting to put the foot work in recovery. Meeting makers make it. Period!
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AA is full of humans. And humans are pretty dumb sometimes, regardless of sobriety. You gotta find a group within the group, or a meeting that youre comfortable with.
Maybe it's not for you, but also, you have to put in some work as well. I sponsor 3 guys at the moment, and one of them is always late or needs a ride or etc etc. He has a million excuses. That's not my problem. I have to live my life. I'm there to be supportive, bot to support him in everything he does. He has to put in work, just like I do.
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This is why I don’t do AA.
I am going to my first AA meeting in months to listen to a speaker. I was involved in several zoom meetings daily. I found most of the people in them to be phony. They say they will be there for you but I had spine surgery and didn’t plug into the meeting and not one person reached out to see if I was ok. I find them circle Around a new comer which is wonderful but they push too much BS in some meetings. I never heard of smart recovery. What type of meetings are they. I had family issues on top or surgery and I need to get serious again. I am looking forward to the speaker tonight. But need something different.
No one said it works if you LIKE it. It works if you WORK it.
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You "relapse so many times" but it's their fault?
We have a guy at one of my meetings that always jumps newcomers with the "you gotta jump right into the steps". I'm like, chill the fück out, this dude just got out of jail, is still drunk, and crying his eyeballs out. How about we just give him a safe place to be for now?
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I will have 34 months this week and to be honest I don’t have a sponsor yet because I had spine surgery so can’t go to in person meetings yet and I don’t want a zoom meeting sponsor. I tried that not good. But one woman in a meeting that I was going every morning kept saying your not going to stay sober if you don’t do the steps and don’t have a sponsor. Every time I spoke. Finally I said well I have 30 months and I don’t have a sponsor and I haven’t started the steps. She ruined the meeting for me so I left and never went back. I know I will do them but I talked to my counselor who has 36 years recovery and he never officially did the steps. He has a sponsor and does one meeting a week. He helps people in recovery all week. They get too pushy. I know if I drink again my husband and daughter are gone plus I will die. It’s not easy but believe me I stick to my boundaries and if I am not comfortable I don’t go. I don’t care who it is. I actually have a nephew that stopped talking to be but he is an alcoholic and both his parent died from it so god bless him. God forbid when he has issues that’s when he will come to me. I want to check out smart recovery too. I rambled. I hope it makes sense. Thank god I am out of that whole awful mess.
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Try CODA
I totally understand. I'm glad you're sober and share with us often.
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I just noticed your profile about the train. lol I love it. Not on that train. At all 
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Have you read the book Alan Carr's quit drinking without willpower?