I wanted to share a bit of my story in hopes that it can appeal to or help those who are just starting their sobriety journey. I want to give support to the newcomers, as a fellow recovering addict myself. When I finally decided to get clean, it wasn’t just an “aha” moment that popped into my head one day. It was a series of poor decisions and emotional/psychological rock bottoms that eventually led me to a “life or death” situation, in which I had no other choice than to get clean. And to get help. I know not everybody has family support out there, but if you do, and they are willing to help you in any way, do not turn away from it. Whether the support comes from biological family, in-laws, or even a friend, let them know you want to turn your life around & don’t go backwards on it. Go to a meeting if you need to and you will find a whole community of people that could help you find the resources you need. But you have to be honest with yourself & admit you’re struggling with addiction. What motivated me to finally leave this life behind was taking off the rose-colored lens and take a good look at all the terrible situations and people I was involved with/in. And I wasn’t healthy. My mental illness/dual diagnosis was reaching a peak point & I couldn’t get out of the hole I made myself. I was digging my own grave. And I wanted out. I made the choice to leave the town I was living in, moving far away from all the people and drug dealers I knew and associated with. I got out of there and I ended up flying to California in the custody of my father, with the intention of getting my life back together. I was very fortunate to have this option in my life & I am still grateful for that second chance. While I was there I decided to go to therapy. I was admitted into psychiatric and medical care for weeks, until I was transferred to an inpatient rehabilitation center. I lived there for 90 days and ended up graduating from treatment a completely new and transformed human being. During my time in treatment I did anything & everything I possibly could to work my program and learn all that I could about the disease of addiction. I worked my steps. I wrote in my journals every day & started taking care of myself. In simple and small ways, such as going to bed early and waking up early, eating a good breakfast, taking a shower and cleaning my room, doing chores, working out and exercising, listening to music and meditating. These small things most of us take for granted ended up being really amazing coping skills for me. And taught me how to start treating myself better. And I spoke honestly and frequently with counselors about my past traumas I willingly surrendered to my inability to control my addiction. I wanted to get clean & turn my life around so badly; to become a normal, functioning human being who doesn’t wake up sick anymore- more than anything in the world. I had nothing to lose at this point anyways, but I also realized that there was truly nothing to stop me from following my goals and my heart. I’m telling you, NO ONE can stop you from getting clean & living the life you truly want. YOU have to be the one to decide it & want it. You may not realize it but you truly DO have the power to change your life & your future.
I was hopelessly addicted to heroin, meth and alcohol for years at one point in my life. I was on the verge of homelessness, weighing 89 lbs with no money or friends. Most of my family didn’t want anything to do with me anymore. I had lost everything. I remember there were days when I would break down, alone and crying, feeling scared and hopeless because I truly believed I was going to be an addict forever. And I felt that I was going to die that way too. But I had a chance to turn it around, a REAL opportunity to fix what was broken, & I ran with it. I didn’t look back.
So while I was in treatment I went to every meeting I possibly could & I shared as often as I could, even when it was hard to speak in front of strangers. But I also listened to other peoples stories. Their stories inspired me, and some I could deeply relate to. I formed real friendships with people I met at meetings. I found a community. People who were just like me, who had years of trauma & abuse in their life, who wanted to be sober and free from the chains of addiction. I used all the resources that were given to me. And yes there were days when I would break down & cry because my anxiety and depression would be through the roof, and I was starting to experience “real emotions”, facing all the stuff I had buried or medicated away for years. Addicts/alcoholics; we have been through the worst and back twice… some of us a couple hundred times. But there is nothing worse in the universe than picking up that drug or that bottle. And you know it deep down. If you want to save yourself, be honest with yourself & just start from the very beginning. Even if you don’t like the way it makes you feel, even if it feels humiliating and depressing to have nothing and start at square one, I promise when you hit rock bottom, there is nowhere else to go than up. And you will find yourself in a place down the road that you could never imagine. A life so beautiful with so much love & happiness you will look back at what you went through and learn to forgive yourself. Life isn’t perfect, but you have the power to fall in love with yourself again. You are not a weak person. Being addicted doesn’t make you weak. You can overcome your challenges & come to see the super powers you really have. Even if you have one day of sobriety, or 1000 days of sobriety, you are a STRONG human being with a fighter inside of you. You’ve got a warrior spirit. And just by simply being here on this app and wanting to connect with other people, ask for advice or read stories, you’re already one more step in the right direction. Be well, my friends, and remember, one day at a time. 
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Thank you very much for sharing. I believe we all have the power to change too. 
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Thank you!!
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Wow, perfectly said! Thank you for this🖤
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Wow, thank you for sharing this! I am in a very similar situation with my mental health and drinking. I have been on this app for 2 weeks and feel so much better but I’m still planning to go to treatment for all the reasons you explained. I keep saying I need a “reboot/reprogramming.” I dealt with sooooo much trauma the last 5 years & completely lost myself. I too am blessed that I have the chance to go get intensive help and I am very ready for it- even though I am feeling a lot better from this app alone, I know it is not enough for what I need now and long term. So happy you allowed your heart to guide you & I am doing the same 
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Well that is a very positive story! You really put the hard work in! Congratulations 
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Beautifully said and am proud of you!
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Powerful share! 
Thank you
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We have a somewhat similar story! I need a freind that may understand me and I can tell the truth to. so I can do what's right. Would you mind being my freind?
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Thanks for sharing!
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Of course. 
Nice to meet you, hope you are having a blessed weekend
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aww thanx! And Nice to digitally meet you as well!
I guess I am. Hope you are too!