I was sober 4 1/2 years and then relapsed in

I was sober 4 1/2 years and then relapsed in 2018 and its been rough these last 3 + years. I've been sober for brief periods during that time but its been rough. I starting this brisk -26 degree morning on day 7. I am also on day 7 for taking all my meds. I'm feeling good but for the crazy early morning cravings. Solution i found so far is grand espresso made on my stove with my bialetti stovetop espresso maker and doings tons of my creative works.