I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for the things I did high and drunk... I set my house on fire trying to kill myself then five years later set my car on fire in a drug induced hallucination I have two arson's on my record and trying to get a job is going to be impossible and I can't rebuild my life without a job... I'm just spiralling and wondering if staying clean and sober is worth it
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Yes, please believe me, it’s worth it. Take any job at all. I don’t care if it’s shoveling horse manure. You will improve from there.
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There are a lot of companies that are felon friendly. Zip Recruiter has them listed, Indeed (although I don't recommend using unless you just use it to look at the company and apply on the company website).
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Thanks I appreciate that so much
Thanks for sharing, it's for sure worth it.
You are worth it. The world needs you to stay here with us, your story is not finished. Staying clean like you have proves you are incredibly strong and the story you will have will be like none other.
It is worth it, nowadays especially there's so many programs for people with a record, ya just gotta search.
Yes it is, it's just water under the bridge, it's in the past. That wasn't you, those were demons. And we as alcoholics and addicts brings the darkness out in us. It's going to take time. One day at a time
Life is worth it. Live to your fulfillment and conquer your dreams 
we got you. Holding hand in hand in prayer, God Grant me the serenity prayer 
prayer works. God bless you thank you for sharing . Be safe and sending warm hugs and love
Staying sober IS worth it. There is nothing in using that brings anything good. I’ll share this, I don’t think anyone thought I’d overcome how deep I was in active use for years much less leave social work and start a career in social media. There’s a way. Find your passion, trust your Higher Power. Keep pushing through.
@nikki365414 
CONGRATULATIONS on your 454 days of sobriety. Keep up the good work.
Have you ever considered the 3rd step or reworking the 3rd step and focusing on the issue at hand?
Just remember forgiving is for giving.
Nikki don’t let those memories bring you down! Your new journey has begun! You will get an amazing job and you are alive to share your story! You got this!
I know that difficulty with forgiveness. It’s something that lingers almost daily for me. It began as difficulty in forgiving myself and is now a difficulty with forgiving one person in particular. What has helped me when a thought of the past comes up and I begin the spiral of scrutiny in my head: I don’t even allow myself to finish the thought anymore. It gets no priority or even permission to reside within my headspace and, ultimately, my heart. The less time I spend thinking of it all, the less I find myself in a position of unforgiving. It’s a “practise makes permanent” situation and I have found that the more I practise this forgiveness and grace, the more it becomes second nature. My dear, I truly hope you are able to find a way to forgive and to look to brighter days because I believe you can. 
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Thanks Valerie I appreciate that
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Thanks everyone I appreciate your help
Nikki, dont give up. I too did things while drugging n drinking that left scares on my record. I now am a behavioral and substance therapist. Don't give up on believing you can do anything you put you mind to. Everytime you thing of quitting sobriety rember why you started. Always here if you need to chat.
I burned my life to the ground more than once, more than twice…
5 years ago I got sober. Today I have a career job, building a retirement and feel pretty decent about myself most days. It was scary and incredibly hard. The felony record didn’t make it easier for me for sure. But I can tell you today the grind was absolutely worth it!
Being sober can be challenging in more than one way. Every change I have faced sober, I breezed through compared to when I was drinking. I have had a thousand different reasons to give up. But I just hold on to the reasons not to.