I'm on day 5 for like the 100th time. Every time I start to feel good I tell myself that I can drink and I won't overdo it or be hungover the next day and then I drink and the self-loathing is horrible! Determined to make it through the weekend alcohol free.
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Just keep pushing at it. You got this
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Keep reaching out to sober buddies. Hit a meeting if you need a safe place. Play the tape to the end. You know how it ends so don’t start… you got this!
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You know what you want. The hiccups don’t matter if you are committed. I’ve stopped judging myself for slipping as long as I know where I’m going
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I found it helped to make a plan for any of my free time in the beginning. I literally wrote down a plan/schedule on everything I was going to do that day, whether it was cleaning, a nap, working out, watching a show, etc. made it easier for me to focus on each activity at a time and before I knew it the day was done.
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Hi, Katrina.
Do not give up on yourself and these insights, suggestions are spot-on.
I got a d u i , spent a weekend in jail and the first thing I did while waiting to be picked up.
I went to get a beer.
Such is how powerful and insidious alcohol, this demon, this disease is.
You are worth more than this chokehold, that is for sure.
It took me close to three additional years of the hellish cycle of starts and stops( post jail, d u i ) to gain a string of moments, hours, days, weeks and months. I don’t want you to have to endure a moment more of the crippling self loathing b c such is part of how and why the cycle starts up. Take it moment by moment if such is what it takes. There are so many people rooting for you. I am one of them. You are awesome for posting to begin with. The point of my ramblings: do n o t give up on yourself. If you did not want to be sober, you would not have reached out to us. Let us know how you are doing right now, Katrina! 
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Oh gosh.. I was in this pattern for three years straight. Miserable 
and my drinking progressively got worse, I tried everything imaginable to be a normal drinker. Then on the last time( my bottom) I was ready and that’s the best I can explain it. Totally defeated, total acceptance and willingness to do whatever it took. I believe that miracle can happen for you because you are worthy
Same. I wear a Memento Mori that reminds me every day that the next time I drink, I’m going to get myself killed, kill Simpsons else, deprive someone of their family member. Extreme, but my life and the lives of others are worth me not having alcohol ever again.
Same same- ! I just made it to day 6!!!!
I was the same. I thought it was a lack of willpower. Turns out it’s a disease, and treating it has nothing to do with being stronger willed.
I found my solution at a 12 step meeting. It’s a good place to start looking for yours too.
I was on and off, once I got my dui it set in, haven't drank since 6 plus months or so.
Hi Katrina: How's it going? As a suggestion, try staying in "the moment," instead of thinking about the weekend. For example, I'm not using/drinking today. I feel confident about this. It's not Saturday yet, but I'll probably be saying the same thing. Thanks.
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Make it your last day 5 6 7 and so on:blush:
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If you truly want to stop, get to an AA meeting
Ok once you go over the edge as you have you can never control it again. I been there. I believe in a comprehensive strategy to sobriety.
Find a program you are comfortable with, AA, The Lucky Club, what ever works for you.
Get educated on alcoholism. Read the book Alcohol Explained by William Porter and checkout the website Sober Powered by Gillian Tietz. She's a recovering alcoholic with a wealth of information.
Surround yourself with a good support system
Get right with God. Prayer works
Best of luck, reach out anytime . Prayers always
Pain is a great motivator, and equalizer. Doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result is a clear definition of insanity. I’ve been there myself and it took what it took to drive me to my knees in defeat.
The only that helped me kick it was getting into a rehab program for a few weeks with no access to it. Left to my own devices, I couldn't make it more than a few days without giving in.
You got this. Just remember why you want to quit. I used to just tell myself I just have to get through today.
When you fail just get up and start over you are worth it 
!!!
Giving up is the easiest thing to do! But trying again... You've learned yet another way that doesn't work and or found out how not to do it!!! One of these times you'll find a system that works for you, so don't give up and or don't stop trying you'll get sooner or later but you'll get it!!!
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