Im struggling and im too tired and in pain to explain. I feel like I’ve been delusional for 2.5 years. Technically almost 3 for the hard drugs. But I have been delusional in thinking it gets better. It hasnt. Im tired.
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Heather, I understand. In my experience it does get better and easier if I stay sober and continue working on the 12 steps of recovery.
Are working with a sponsor?
At times I think is wht we need to move forward. We got tired of what our life has become and are ready to move on.
hug I am sorry you are struggling. I understand the feeling of being in pain, tired and exhausted. But try and keep in mind how far you’ve come! How amazing it feels to be here & present!
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It doesn’t matter but yes I am. I’m still stuck in the same apartment and environment I did drugs in last. I am stuck because I have no where else to go and I’m my abusive mothers care giver. No one in the program of NA will help me. My sponsor is my third one. She’s rude and mean and doesn’t give a darn. No one does.
Why do you think you're picking a sponsor with that kind of demeanor? We have to ground ourselves in reality in order to break delusion. Which means we have to get real about how we ended up where we are. Not all sponsor are good sponsors. So don't let that derail you. You might have to go through some duds to find your match. Hang in there.
Trust the process. Try doing a gratitude list and see what you do have instead of focusing on what you don’t. I have been doing in for 730 days straight and it has changed my perspective. Sending you positive vibes 