Im struggling cuz, I'm a dual addict as well as a gambler,!
Right now I'm working on a 65 questionnaire and they actually have questions I thought I delt with,but,really I haven't thongs haunt my mind and I'm almost 60yrs old, I may not think of them everyday, but holy geez Louise,these questions are from childhood until now, I realized that I haven't dealt with it, even though I put everything in a Pandora box and threwthe key away, well doing this questionnaire reopened that box and it really opened things I didn't want to remember, it totally sucks cuz I struggle everyday and I dont want to relapse I love loosid and feedback from everyone, but I had to share my thoughts cuz thats where I'm at today, so thank you to anyone who can help me stay clean sober and positive 
Some days bring up things we never saw coming especially doing a questionnaire asking for you to dig deep. Make sure you have support and reach out if it’s too much. My dm is always open. Do you go to meetings or have a sponsor? I hope you feel better
Deborah, this might sound like a lot, but it’s not. I suggest 90 different in person AA/GA/NA meetings in 90 days. This is how I found the meetings and people I liked and enjoyed. I got sponsored and did the 12 steps (huge game changer!!!) better than therapy, antidepressants etc.
I got free at 42 and nobody including me didn’t think it was possible. But I just went to meetings early every morning and every night. Gave myself a chance and smothered my addictionS with recovery.
I’m here if you want to talk or have any questions