Im struggling with my addiction. I invalidate myself to much and i self sabotage. I am going to court for my children and want to be different but i dont know how to work that part of my mind anymore
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Hey, i understand what you mean. Sometimes itās hard getting out of your own way. With the self sabotage, as i came to find, thereās an abundance of fear that hangs over that. The fear of it not working, the fear of it working but then in the future fail. the fear of it changing your entire life. that being said, āthe fear of an outcome is usually what makes the fear come trueā kind of like self fulfilling prophecy because you drive the narrative of fear so hard it becomes an unconscious effort. At the same time, fear is the only time we can be courageous. how can you be courageās when you invalidate yourself? let me ask. how come you do that to yourself? the rest of the world will do that for you. people are dumb and mean. When they canāt articulate emotion they lash out to make others feel like they do. Other people will have no problem invalidating you so before they even try, show them you canāt be blown out of the water and theyāll shrink. And yet, as dumb and small as people can be, any human being is capable of anything they set their mind to. I promise you. It takes time and repetition to create or break a habit. they say 21 days but a solid 3 months and it wont be as much as a mental effort as its Just becoming a part of your life. I hope some of this has made sense and I actually did understand what you meant lol