πππππππππππππ in Recovery. How long should you wait to start dating? What if you were already in an existing relationship and now itβs just not the same. Do you let go or try to make it work?
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I am marriedβ¦ it was really tough the first six months or so. I had to regain the trust. BUT, it has actually made my marriage stronger. If you are with someone who supports your getting sober and helps you thatβs awesome. If not, then decisions need to be made. I would t jump into a new relationship, only because the emotions at the beginning are so raw and we need to learn to deal with them. Adding someone elseβs emotions on top of that is a downward spiral waiting to happen. Just my two cents.
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The clichΓ© you have to love yourself first is TRUE. The reason you might be itching to date is fear of loneliness. My relationship with my HP had to be rock solid first as well. Through meetings, I developed trust in others and now have a really strong βgirl tribe.β I have a sense of community around meβ¦from there I peeled back the layers to find out who I really was and what I really wanted in my next partner FIRST. I wrote it out with intentions, affirmations and a vision board (they work!). Working the Steps helps tremendously because I can see the same character defects in every relationship, which I donβt want to bring into a new relationshipβ¦I want sober dating, too.
When youβre ready, Iβd first commit to taking yourself on dates-just one hour a week. Can you take yourself to the movies? Go out to dinner? Develop your creative side! Make a bucket list of hobbies/passions/past times you want to try or enjoy doingβ¦by yourself.
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