It happened, now what?

Recovery
#1

Well.

It happened.

I am having a really hard time reaching out to my supports, like my dad, or my mum or sisters, especially now that it's mothers day.

On friday, i put myself in a risk situation and the worst case scenario happened. I relapsed.

It was really bad, i didn't get home until 3 or 4 am. I missed the gym and i spent all of Saturday and last night sweating it out alone at home.

Today, i feel better. I am making sure to get back to my routine and keep moving forwards, but i know i can't keep this hidden or hold it in. But how do I tell people? What do I tell them? How do I reach for the supports that I know I need?

I am dissapointed in myself for sure, but I do know that right now what I need is compassion and understanding. Not a series of negative self talk and shaming myself for what happened.

Trying desperately to understand when the relapse started.

Uhg :frowning:

2 Likes
#2

You did the right first step held yourself accountable, it happened but it doesn’t have too keep happening. It’s a slip not a full relapse, you didn’t keep using second right step. Get those closes too you together tell them what happened and ask them to help you make a recovery plan moving forward so it don’t happen again. Call your sponsor and go too a meeting together if you must. There you can safely talk it out with those who have been there. The time you stacked up is still there on the “wagon” get back on and continue on in sobriety. You got this and know you got this!

2 Likes
#3

That gentleman said it well. I'm 61, everyone knows what I've done, I keep no secrets, why I've done it, but no more but I am alone

1 Like
#4

Nope you got all of us​:grinning::hugs:

1 Like
#5

This disease can be so frustrating. It’s like we were born with this self sabotage gene that wants to destroy us. It has taken a few bottoms (some with substances and some just behaviors) for me to get understand deeper just how sick my thinking is and how hard I have to work my recovery program. At this point you just have to work on forgiving yourself. Remember you’re sick not bad. If you’re working a 12 step program, keep it simple with steps 1, 2, and 3, call your sponsor, and lean on your support. Those in the program understand. Unfortunately, family can be more difficult. It’s all out of your control except what you can do for yourself today. We can’t make it all better right away. It’s one day at a time. Stay positive