Yes! I can relate. The first few months I told people countless times that I felt as if I was grieving my old self and all my friendships and relationships”
It’s normal and appropriate to grieve these relationships - we have to do the work to make healthy space in our lives for new friendships and relationships. I wouldn’t let anyone tell you whether any of your past relationships were “true” or let them dismiss the friendships you forged while you were drinking or using. That’s just silly for someone that’s not YOU to assume, “oh none of your friendships for the past 10+ years (or however long you were struggling with your substance abuse) weren’t real because you were surrounding yourself with shitty people.”
Ya, maybe you were around some truly shitty human beings who put your life in danger and caused you physical and emotional trauma, but maybe you were surrounded by others also struggling with the same demons?
Anyone of your friends from the past could enter recovery at any moment.
It took a long time to get past the victim mentality and mentality that my family and friends SHOULD be here for me. 5 months clean and sober and I still struggle with it, but I know any resentment I have towards them is only hurting me. It’s all love.
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