It’s really frustrating when people trivialize me being a recovering addict and having severe anxiety and PTSD.
I feel so alone and alienated. These people are family members to boot. :-(,
2 Likes
It is easy to marginalize what they cannot understand. Believe me when I say I feel your pain.
2 Likes
Steven, thank you so much for your understanding and support. I’ve been feeling so alone and it’s so nice to know that I’m not all alone in this. It’s been a rough week. Thank you so much!
1 Like
Oh honey, no one deserves that kind of treatment regardless. That’s a punch to the heart though. It’s hurtful to you.
I have cut family members off. If they weren’t serving my highest good or the highest good of humanity. Peace out. I don’t let anyone disturb my peace.
Use your anxiety and PTSD as a tool to propel you forward. These are invitations to grow.
It’s so exhausting isn’t it? I felt it was. Feeling alone is okay, that will pass, as emotions do. If they alienate you because you’re getting healthy, then f-ck them.
Your family doesn’t have to be blood. Trust me I’m living proof of that.
You’re here, using your voice. You are powerful!
3 Likes
Family members can be the worst. If they choose (and yes it is a choice) to be less than supportive then they are a form of kryptonite. After all they probably got hurt the worst by drunk you so they have the biggest axe to grind and BONUS they know your hot buttons better than most.
The good news is there is a cure. Boundaries. You have to calmly tell then that they are doing something that endangers your sobriety and that frankly they shouldnt do to anybody anyway. Calmly inform them that they need to stop and that if they don't you will have to withdraw until they can meet your needs. It won't go well in the beginning but even as they sulk you will start to feel whatever burden they were to you lessen. Then it's in them to either play ball or go play on the freeway. I have had several people say that the new sober me is ruthless in my commitment to doing what I need to stay sober and I'm ok with it. I hope this advice helps in some way but remember that all advice on here and two dollars will buy you a cup of coffee.
2 Likes
Some family are not going to understand because they don't want to, and accepting that has been a difficult road for me as well. One of the gifts of recovery is the chance to form a new family of our choosing.
1 Like
Also, Karen I know too well the feeling of hurt and betrayal that can occur when I open up to someone about my PTSD and anxiety and get the "oh I think it wasn't that bad" or "what do you need to be anxious about" responses. You are so not alone. I take it as an opportunity to learn who I can trust and with whom I need to have healthy boundaries.
2 Likes
You don't have to feel too hot when family members fail you,you just have to look at it as a way of facing your challenges alone and by trying this first it will propel you and makes you stronger
I feel your pain and I have had the same problem
I feel you one hundred percent you’re not alone not at all
You got this … if they don’t support you we will 
1 Like
What GREAT advice!! Right on!!
My reply to those people. I'm 64, had a stroke at 40 burned half my brain sells on booze. What your excuse for being stupid.