Its a strange feeling, to wake up one day and realize, holy moly, I'm clean and sober...it can be enlightening. The fog that once filled our minds, slowly dissipating. It is both a blessing, and a curse. On one hand, you have achieved that Sobriety your inner turmoil fought for, but on the other? Every mistake you made while in that drug/alcohol induced stupor comes cascading back into reality. Every wrong turn, every lapse in judgment...they all come flooding in, crashing through the gates that held them back. These are moments we all face, sometimes brutal, sometimes terrifying, even shameful in most of our cases. While these memories may seem like the end of the world as we relive them, they are also a firm reminder of one very simple truth...we are human. And I say this, not to excuse our behaviors or the actions we took to hurt others, but instead to remind us all to give ourselves just a little bit of grace. We have made mistakes, yes, some of those mistakes costing us everything. But we are doing what is necessary to repair, and rebuild. We're making amends and acknowledging our faults. Our addictions did not happen overnight, thus repairing what we have broken, will not happen overnight either. So please, as you make your way through this journey of recovery, please give yourself the grace you deserve, for fighting through the trenches of addiction into a life no longer ruled by drugs or alcohol.
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This is why we work 12 steps of recovery