I'm reaching out because I'm scared to death. So far, so good I thought. Some of you may know set my friend , tony bowen got murdered last tuesday. I can't swear on this app even though I want to. Can someone give the advice or how to deal with such a painful\nDescribable anger.\nThat I am trying to deal with right now. I thought I was doing everything right to celebrate 6 months. I just went.\nTo my home group.\nI just got upset about everything. The\nPeculiar thing is that I do not want to use.I just want to be able to\nSurvive these feelings and deal with them!!! I feel like a little child with no coping skills, no boundaries. My higher power is my lord , jesus and I cry out to him that 
I hurt. This too shall pass. I realize that it's just so hard so extremely hard.\n To see him across the hallway from my apartment. I don't make friends easy yes ; like most addicts. I have repressed rage from childhood until now trauma ( lovely) I just don't want to deal with it anymore.You feel me? How do you get through those tough times? How do you bounce, back like normal people do.? Thank you for your time and I love all of you so much.I hope you know that.\nDon't worry, suicide would never be an option.\nJust so painful
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I lost my best friend recently and I don't think we ever really get past it. I just try to picture them in their happy place and pray for that for them.
Lauren,listen you have to understand, that's not gonna be easy, I have felt you greif,and it never passes only gets somewhat easier with time,hopefully you are a child of christ,because you have to understand that this death,can be carried with honor, in honor to stay clean, in there name, and to go on to help others, that to have to deal with lost,specially if you were clean together, carry there name,with your sobriety with honor!!! Hope this helps,God bless you,