At rock bottom I froze like a coward and didn't have near the guts you had to share. That shows you have some major fight and a higher purpose going on. Such a crisis can either mean danger or opportunity. My encouragement would be that while opportunity may sound like a light tap instead of a loud knock at the door, crack that door open and take a cautious peek. It is okay to be hesitant; addiction has made us all so frightened and new confidence isn't gained overnight. I believe in you!
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Step one, stop digging. It might take a long time to climb out but if you keep digging you will never get out. Remind yourself that your on the right path. You are doing what you need to do, you ask for help. To some degree, we are all here because the path we were on was making our lives worse. I have done lots of reading and listening to podcast. It helped me to know that I was not alone. Many others have made it through these days.
Thanks, I love the door analogy.
I was in my rock bottom for quite a while. One day something finally clicked and I said I need help. That was the easy part. Now… so much I need to clean up and fix. There’s help out there though. You have to want it and be strong enough to do what you need to if you want to be better. Hardest part. You can do it though! You made it this far 