Just received this on another platform. Im thinking someone could relate.The lights are up. The music is playing. And you’re barely holding on.
Nobody talks about this part how the “most wonderful time of year” can feel like drowning in tinsel and forced smiles. How every commercial, every gathering, every “Merry Christmas” can echo in the hollow spaces where joy used to live.
If you’re white-knuckling your way through December, struggling to stay afloat while everyone else seems wrapped in warmth and wonder I see you.
The truth they don’t put on greeting cards: Recovery doesn’t take a holiday. Neither does grief. Or trauma. Or the ache of who we’ve lost or who we used to be.
Maybe you’re sitting at a table surrounded by people but feeling completely alone. Maybe you’re avoiding the table altogether. Maybe you’re one trigger away from reaching for the thing that almost destroyed you
the habit, the substance, the person, the pattern you swore you’d never go back to.
Here’s what I need you to hear:
You are not broken for struggling when everyone else is celebrating.You are not weak for needing help during the “happiest season.”You are not failing because this is hard.
You’re human. And you’re here. And that matters.
So before you slip, before you silence the pain the old way, try these instead:
Call your sponsor. Text your support group. Reach for a voice that understands not judgment, just truth.
Honor what you need. Say no to the party. Leave early. Journal in your car. Walk until your mind quiets.
Protect your routine like your life depends on it because it does. Sleep. Eat. Move. The basics become lifelines.
Give yourself the grace you’d give someone you love. You don’t have to be “fixed” by New Year’s.
Seasonal depression is real. Holiday trauma is real. The weight of expectation versus reality is crushing.
But so is your strength.
You didn’t come this far
through the nights you didn’t think you’d survive, through the days you rebuilt yourself piece by shattered piece
to lose yourself in December.
This season isn’t about perfect. It’s about present. It’s about choosing yourself one more time. One more hour. One more breath.
You are not alone in this darkness.
And you are so much stronger than the storm trying to pull you under.
Keep showing up. Keep reaching out. Keep holding on.
We’re here. Right here with you. 
If you’re struggling, please reach out. You matter more than you know.
Much love
Rachael