Stay in the program and you will find out what they mean about success and failure in these above responses. The only failure is giving up. Both success and failure are words for man made absolutes that do really exist in a spiritual sense. If you can mine this for all it’s worth you will have something worth more than any amount of riches or gold.
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Definitely not a failure. Its a miracle when an alcoholic doesn’t drink, I relapsed a few times. Today is a new day. Meetings meetings meetings, lots of meetings and keep praying. No matter what keep coming back. I’ll say some prayers for you and ask that you say some for me to stay in the program, one day at a time.
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I relapsed with mouthwash after 9 months sober! I feel your pain. But we aren’t failures. Just get back up.
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Relapse happens to us all. Get back at it.
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You are not a failure. You are an addict/alcoholic and it’s what we do if we don’t work a program. I can’t speak for other recovery programs, but AA works for me when I work and live the steps.
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Life is not an all or nothing journey. In my addiction though, I treated it this way. I tried several times to live a sober life and each time I lapsed or relapsed, my addiction told me that I just threw everything away, that I lost everything, that I am worthless, that I will never "get it", and that me dying an alcoholic is my destiny. My addiction told me "oh well, there is nothing you can really do about it, you will never do anything right".
But...
Each time I re-entered treatment I learned something, each time I faced the incredibly horrible shame I had from lapsing, from "failing", I grew stronger, each time I heard my addiction tell me these things and I stood up and said NO, I built more of my foundation!
You are not failing, you are learning!! You did not fail after 6 months, you HAVE a period of 6 months of good sobriety achieved! That does not get erased or just go away. You earned that!! YOU did that!!
Failure? I most certainly think not! Keep on learning! Keep on fighting!! Face that shame and grow!! You will get there! I am proud of you!
YOU deserve a better way of life for yourself!
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Is it really a failure if you learn from it and ultimately succeed? The word failure bothers me. I’ve relapsed too but each time I learned something new about myself. Remain strong in your recovery. Stay dedicated to the process. It’s progress not perfection!!!!
Amen to what you said Eric! Heck I'd be psyched to make 6 months!!! Cowgirl up!!! After 6 months you know you can do this!!!
Not a failure at all, just a learning experience.
Lots of good comments of encouragement. I tend to be a little more brash. Reason being, I've seen several alcoholics that relapsed and never made it back. This is a matter of life-and-death if you're as alcoholic as I am.
I don't want you to be the next person that doesn't make it back Melissa so it's time to really take your recovery more serious than you ever have before.
Ask yourself a question. Did things get better for you after you relapsed?
I've never heard of anyone who relapsed that came back and said that things actually got better for them. It's all a big lie; Alcohol feeds us a big lie and tells us that this time, everything will be OK. But it never is, is it?
You have to learn to play the scene forward. I'll bet you can remember having a little bit of relief when you started getting that feeling from taking the 1st couple of drinks. And then when you were on your way to being drunk you wondered what the heck happened and how could you have blown 6 months?
Then you wake up realizing that it was all a big mistake. Now you have more guilt to carry around realizing that you accomplished absolutely nothing. Whatever you're feeling right now, I want you to hold on to that feeling for as long as possible. I want you to forever remember what you're feeling like right now.
Because sooner or later you're going to be faced with that lie all over again and you're going to have to make a decision.
When you were contemplating taking that 1st drink, did you pick up the phone and call anyone? Do you have a support group with phone numbers to call? Most people never really make it past this app.. This app is filled with people that relapse week, after week, after week.
The reason being is because they're not taking action beyond this app. I highly recommend that you start getting to meetings everyday. I highly recommend that you find yourself a sponsor that will take you through the 12 steps.
YOU HAVE TO WANT THIS THING MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD.
HOW BAD DO YOU WANT THIS?
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You’re going to be ok. Just get back on the horse. Got a great support network here!
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Thank you for this friend
Now this is a reply I appreciate Dave. Your a straight up person like me. I respect that. Your words put a lot of my wandering thoughts into perspective. I appreciate you!
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AA Thought for the Day
Keeping sober is the most important thing in my life. The most important decision I ever made was my decision to give up drinking. I am convinced that my whole life depends on not taking that first drink. Nothing in the world is as important to me as my own sobriety. Everything I have, my whole life, depends on that one thing. Can I afford ever to forget this, even for one minute?
Meditation for the Day
I will discipline myself. I will do this disciplining now. I will turn out all useless thoughts. I know that the goodness of my life is a necessary foundation for its usefulness. I will welcome this training, for without it God cannot give me His power. I believe that this power is a mighty power when it is used in the right way.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may face and accept whatever discipline is necessary. I pray that I may be fit to receive God’s power in my life.
Quoted from the app 24 Hours a Day.
Find recovery resources at www.hazeldenbettyford.org.
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You’ve already gotten lots of advice; but I do want to say this: be gentle with yourself. Treat yourself like a dear friend who you want good things for.
Relapse is part of Recovery...keep moving on.. I've picked up many white chips....
You are so awesome thank you
Courageous is more like it. Keep coming back
I had 13 years, relapsed for 2+ years. Just picked up 4 month chip. Absolutely no shame. I'm Grateful 
Oh I sooo know how that feels, the shame is almost unbearable. And it appears the literature on the subject is correct because after a spree the obsession and the phenomenon of craving do come back. I’ve had relapses that only lasted one night and ended in disaster with pain and consequences so horrible I didn’t think I would survive. Yet after the release my mind kept wandering to fantasies of using again, the obsession had returned. I took those lessons to heart and today it only strengthens my resolve to surrender and stay surrendered. So you see good can come out of it.