I probably have the same challenges as you do when it comes to seeking and understanding God because I too am only human. I do have a higher power that I call God. The reason that people relapse is because they believe the lie; that this time, everything will be okay. But it never is, is it?
This comes from a chapter in the big book entitled The Doctor's Opinion. I pass it on to people quite frequently because in it I believe is the reason why we drank and what the solution is.
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are
restless, irritable and discontented
unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinksādrinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the
phenomenon of craving
develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an
entire psychic change
there is very little hope of his or her recovery.ā
The psychic change is acquired by getting through the 12 steps. As you do this, the obsession will be removed. It tells us that if we are painstaking about this phase of our development we will be amazed before we are halfway through.
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.
The Twelve Promises
We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
We will comprehend the word serenity.
We will know peace.
No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
Self-seeking will slip away.
Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change.
Fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us.
We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among usāsometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.
I know that's a lot of replies but your recovery is important right?
Exactly. I was trying to understand a lot of times, why, why I did that first drink. And couldnāt find an answer