I’m frustrated. I’m lonely. I lost my family due to alcoholism and drugs. My oldest son won’t talk to me, my youngest, my daughter, is hesitant to be around me even in unsupervised visitation. My wife of 22 years is divorcing me. She decided to do this while I was getting treatment at the VA. It’s amazing to me how much I’ve helped friends and family over the years, only to watch them turn away from me when I need them the most. I’m a nurse, and I’m slowly putting my life together on my own. I’m working so hard on recovery, I want to able to share it with someone. But no one wants to get close to a damaged person. I hide my feelings from people, I hide my past, I hide my situation so I don’t alienate people or frighten them away. I’m so lonely.
The best way we can earn back the respect and trust from those we hurt and or lost is to truly recover from this illness. The only problem is that true recovery is not a overnight process. It takes a long time and a lot of work to achieve. We don't always get back what we lost and usually if we do it takes more time than we would like. The best chance you have is to recover, clear your side of the street, and stay sober and chips will fall where they fall. Only thing you can really control is what you do from here on out, not how you think others should be treating you. We do a lot of damage in our illness, sometimes more than we think. Good luck to you
Just keep in mind easy does it, we didn’t become addicted in a day/month/year it took us many times using, all we can do is the best for the day, and as we do that those that have remained will see and we can gain understanding and begin to rebuild relationships with loved ones; and when you’re experiencing loneliness, do just what you did here because you’re not alone and there are people rooting for you and your recovery!
Roy are you working on the 12 steps with a sponsor ?
Yes