What is the long term mindset for reconciling and recovery with a spouse you aren’t willing to let go? I’m the addict, she likes to booze once in a while and it totally impacts her moods but I am forbidden to call it out. I’m serious about sobriety now but she has walls up everywhere and staying on guard.
We went on a six month separation where I moved out while worked on sobriety, but we still saw each other monthly. I relapsed until a couple months ago and I’m moving back in because we see progress we can build on in many different ways, mainly from my level of commitment and belief in myself. I feel like I’ve surrendered to sobriety finally.
However she has walls up everywhere and I’m trying to accept the best thing is sober time so less words, less convincing, and more sober choices over the course of time.
She’s got a sharp attitude and very demanding about her space, time, and feels a little power tripping under the guise of protecting her emotional safety.
What mantras can I keep telling myself during tense situations or difficult situations?