Lonliness and despair
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Please don't there are only bad moments sometimes even days that just facts. Things will get better . 
for u
If u need to reach out there is always a brother or sister in recovery that will listen and understand we've been thru spit to
David you got a good heart . Yes there is always someone you can open up conversation with . Iām here Roger
Reaching out to something bigger than you had saved me. If it can work for me it definitely can can work for you