Loosid Sober Tip of the Day September 26

Sober Tips
#1

Resentment is the #1 offender. It kills more alcoholics and addicts than anything.

We talk about resentment frequently in the daily tips for this very reason. Why? Because repetition is the mother of skill.

In the same way we need to remind ourselves what works, it is equally as powerful to remind ourselves what does not work.

Most of use reading this have a resentment or two in our back pockets. Even if we have done the work to free ourselves of resentments, so many of us hold onto a few as we feel we are not ready to let them go.

Just for today, make a decision to let them go. You are drinking the poison waiting for the other person to suffer. Choose not to suffer today.

How did this tip resonate with you? Let us know your thoughts below. There are many people in the Loosid community who need to hear what you have to say.

With Love, Loosid :pray::heart:

3 Likes
#2
#3

I will let go..!!!

#4

I need to let go of resentment I hold w my aunt amazing how 3 years sober I had the worst childhood w my alcoholic mother who only liked my brothers was mean to me !! I hated her for not believing me about something my sisters (14 ) years apart did to me when I was preteen chose him over me my Nana raised me—today my mom has dementia and I’m the only one there everyday for her I forgave her in my 4th and 5th step but even w dementia me and her are building a relationship I craved as a child and i let go of a resentment that almost killed me many times thru a life of self-destruction!!! Sorry so much this app is great!!!

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#5

Meant what my sisters father did to me

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#6

This topic hit home. While I was in rehab my brother and his wife kept my children which was very much a blessing. After I graduated my kids came home and eventually told how much my brother and his wife degraded me to them and how much hurt and confused them and caused them to feel like they didn't know what to believe. That cut me right to my core. We were considering having Thanksgiving with them but I don't even know if I want to be in their presence. They told my children I would never recover. And now I'm struggling with how to let go of the pain and feeling of betrayal but still protect myself. But my kids are concerned that if we decide not to do dinner with them that they will know that the kids told me the things they said. This is something I'm going to have to trust the universe to guide me in because I don't have the answers to this one. Thanks for letting me share.

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#7

I agree resentment is # 1 offender. Even today after having over 8 years of sobriety, I still have resentment that I thought I dealt with and gone and they sometimes come back up.

#8

Cheryl...I feel your heart. I also had a Mother who did anything to make me feel worthless and put my sister on a pedestal. Just because I was "just like my father". I was her Cinderella. I also was the only one there when she was aging , sick and dying. I did as you and loved her as my own child and built a relationship unquestionably. Naturally and without regret. This came Naturally for me...because "I was Just Like My Father!:heart:

#9

Jason, I agree. I replied to Cheryl. However you make a good point. I still have resentments that come up even now that my Mom has passed for over 10 years now. I struggle everyday to truly let go. As hard as I try I believe I always will. Just fo!

#10

Agree with this tip, resentment is dangerous. Resentment is what gave me a reason to drink. In sobriety I see the best thing for me is to stay in my own lane. I cannot control what others do or think but I can be responsible for me.

#11

Wow!!! Your reply touched me soo much even as many Womens Mtgs I’ve never heard anyone share like what you did I feel so alone at times w my lil Shih-tzu Bella I feel I want to chat w you some more can we text eachother??? I’m new on this app

#12

Where are you from

#13

What a morning w the family. Gotta let it go for me. I don’t deserve more.

#14

Resentments suck! Period! But they are a part of our lives! It’s when I write down my resentments in step 4, I can begin to heal. Step 4 really shows us what and where are faults are. However there are some resentments that are not our fault. If and when we see the parts of us that were hurt, like ego, pride, pocket book, relationship, sex relations (in some cases) and self esteem when can now see that it’s a bit selfish to hold on to these emotions. My inventory I took was almost all about having expectations of how others should have been or if they only did what I wanted or told them to do. Fear came up as well, I had a lot of fear of what others thought of me and what I expect I should be like.
Today after completing my 5th step with my Sponsor I’m able to sleep at night. I’m able to walk tall, smile and let go of the guilt, shame and remorse I had held on to for so long. No more justification for my actions. Compassion and forgiveness for those that hurt me, those I’ve hurt, and for myself as I continue down this spiritual path of sobriety. I’m not perfect! But I’m accountable and responsible for my actions, inaction and reactions today.
Stay sober my friends! I love you all!

#15

I deal with this with my family as well… I will pray for you, & your wonderful, caring, supportive, compassionate, patient, having empathy for you, loving kids! They are remarkable! Pray to the Lord God for guidance, & forgiveness, to guide your heart, mind, & soul to hear His loving wisdom, compassion, & love :heart:! It is difficult! If you choose to go: focus on kindness, compassion, patience, empathy, & love :heart:! (Do the opposite of what they have chosen towards you)… Of course, do what is healthy, & best for you, & your kids… Your health: mental, & physical is very important… Unfortunately, we can not be all things to all people. (My love & prayers are with you, & your kids, & your family (brother, & his wife), in Jesus name I pray. Whatever you choose, choose love over all… They can not take away your wonderful, compassionate, caring, patient, kind, loving heart! All The Best, God Bless, you, & your family! Love Peter

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#16

Well said my friend. Very well said♡