I am thinking a lot about the death of the self and deconstruction. I am thinking about being the sum of all my experiences. I am thinking about the future and sober ducking cuddles with my Rad sober woman ! What does that relationship even look like even feel like. I had a high profile relationship where I was mostly sober killing it. But later I found out that can not be trusted when you see substance abuse someone with no tools that sees nothing wrong is in denial.
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