I’m coming up on a year (no FRONTS) in a few days and I’m experiencing some of the weirdest emotions. I’ve gone through my steps with my sponsor and restarted them about a month ago, i sponsor women, I have commitments, but still I have this overwhelming sense of dread. I just have the “f*ckits” I think.
I’ve seen so many people come back after a relapse this week, people I thought had really really strong programs, and it terrifies me. I don’t think I’ve completely fallen off the beam by any means but seeing someone who secretaried my home group and I assumed was on vacation lose a decade and stand as a newcomer was really devastating.
I feel like none of this made sense and I feel weird posting this when there’s people with a few days strung together dealing with real problems. I guess what I’m asking, If I’m asking anything at all, Is what the heck am I experiencing???
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