Really depressed and I don't know why
Your brain is resetting. It takes time to fully reboot and recover the happy chemicals in the brain. Yet smile and look to the stars and sky but not I repeat not into the sun. Yet smile though your heart is aching. 
I don't know you but I care about you and your recovery. Try to get out of yourself, take a walk, do some reading and get to a meeting if you can. Journal all that bad stuff out, hand all that pain over to your higher power.
Hope your day is getting better. You got 2 great replies ^^^^. Donāt beat yourself up about having a bad day. Sometimes you just got to allow yourself to not feel well. Itās ok. You donāt have to run from it. You donāt have to overthink it. It really is ok. If you donāt pick up a drink or a drug, you will have made a great stride in your recovery. Learning to get thru the tough times without Fāing up is a huge lesson we all need to learn. We are proud of you for acknowledging it, sharing it, and working thru it. This is recovery!!
Thanks. I will be okay one day. When I get out of my current home
Life is a series ups and downs. Whether weāre sober or drunk. Weāll still have our bad days. Itās life. Being sober doesnāt mean rainbows, butterflies and unicorns all of the time.
Depression is a disease of the kind and of the body. Clinical Depression does not require a reason. It simply is.
There is post a cute withdrawal, which can Manifest as clinical depression and/or situational depression. Regardless, when it comes to the disease of depression, best to seek professional help. Similar to cancer, Itās nothing to mess around with. They an offer you wonderful suggestions and solutions.
Previous message is completely true and factualā¦.just your brainā¦not your lifeā¦be gentle ..Keith Kayle
I dont except rainbows and butterflies. Just to not have mental illness that makes me feel like I want to die