I recently acquired a sponsee. And I’m struggling with the weight of all his troubles. I want to help him. But I’m not exactly sure how. Any thoughts would be welcome. Thank you.
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That is a tough spot to be in. You want to give your sponsee the best help you can while not losing your sobriety and sanity. Just remember sometimes we are better sponsors when we acknowledge that someone else may do a better job with that person. You can only do so much to help people in the steps. Maybe find someone with more time under their belt and more sponsees to get advice from.
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Thank you so much for the suggestion. That is great advice.
Sponsorship should be uplifting and mutually beneficial. If leading someone through the steps is not elevating you both, it’s likely that someone is not ready to let go. Step 1 is terrifying for people who haven’t yet been given that gift of desperation.
I had to stop working with someone once. Because they were not ready to surrender their own will. The agony of addiction must be greater than the need for control or it just won’t work.
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God is supposed to carry the weight.and give answers.
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I'm not sure of the full dynamics. However, it's always best to be honest with them but use enough tact as not to push them away but not to be so lenient on them that they think they can easily get away with anything. Basically never sugar coat where they are steering of course but do not belittle them in the process. You'll both grow from it. Also you could ask your sponsor about specifics without breaking anonymity.
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