Today I have one month sober, I have been having a difficult time because my family doesn’t believe in AA or alcoholism and they all drink heavily. A lot of my family is even in the wine and beer business. They are supportive of my drug free life, but don’t understand the alcohol aspects. With the holidays coming I am scared of the challenges to come with them. Any good advice on how to go through the holidays sober for the first time?
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I have been sober for just over a month and went to a neighbors clambake and my neighbors are big drinkers. I brought a 6 pack of N/A beer and I think that helped. The thought to have just one alcoholic drink popped in my head a few times but I didn’t cave as we all know just one never happens. Went home at a decent hour and did t have a problem. I was pretty nervous but made it. Don’t cave to the thoughts of having just one As that will happen
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It's going to be tough, Kelsea. I think it's best knowing what you're getting into. Don't ignore it.
You may want to bring non-alcoholic beer with you. Or bring a mocktail recipe to share with your family.
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We have a blog about mocktails if you want to check it out. It's on the newsfeed.
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i just try not to look that far a head right now. One day at a time is your very best friend. also get your sober network going. if you need Someone To text or call I’m free I’m newly (again) sober as well
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Nice
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What Kevin said!!! Those holidays are still a ways away. If your family approves of “your drug-free lifestyle,” I'd think it be easier for them to accept AA, because drinking always lead me to using drugs. Alcohol IS technically a drug (ask any doctor). If you have experience with AA, I strongly suggest that you get a sponsor and a support group of other recovering alcoholics of your age (and gender). Many folks talk about “the holidays and alcohol.” Many. Working the AA program and having that support has helped countless alcoholics stay sober and navigate the holidays. IT WORKS!!
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Just go for shorter period of time your gonna feel uncomfortable after all you always drank with your family at least I did and I had to leave early coarse I wanted be hi with them It will pass but takes time I always shared about it at meetings I’m sober a while now so I speak from experience
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Thank you 
I agree with what was said before. Do you go to AA? Could you call your sponsor beforehand to make a plan for if things get overwhelming? Also like what was said just go there for a short period of time, and you can leave early If you feel uncomfortable. Create new ways to celebrate the holidays. The first few holidays for me were really hard, I went to meetings on those days- it was nice seeing people. maybe this year by then there will be some in person meetings in your area. some Groups will have food or gatherings for fellowship after. i was super triggered by holidays in my past but I found ways to make them fun again with sober friends.
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Thanks for the good solid advice everyone.
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Find a new family, thats what mine did to me, for drinking.
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I'd suggest trying to spend this holiday season elsewhere if you can. With friends, maybe more distant family. The fact is you're trying to male a big change and it's really too soon for you to be in a high risk situation. You're doing this FOR YOU and nobody else. Drug use is just the symptom, not the cause. It's pain and trauma that cause this and we use to cover it up. 9/10 times that trauma has come from our family. You have time to explore other options. Also keep in mind this only really needs to be 2 days of your life. Thanksgiving day and Christmas day. Skip New Year, that's 100% a nonstarter for your recovery.
Another option is to significantly lower your exposure. Maybe stop by for just 2 hours and hold firm to that time frame. Maybe even an hour.
Again, this is for YOU and no one else. Therefore you have to hold yourself accountable at all costs. Rely on the 12 principles. Some keys principles that come to mind are honesty, faith, strength, disciple, and perseverance. I'm sure there are more applicable to this situation.
Stay strong and make the tough choices THIS holiday season, and the next may be much easier. This is going to be tough, but if you take and one day at a time approach and a “it's just another day” outlook, it'll be easier. You'll never experience Christmas 2019 again, and you've never experienced 2020.
Best of luck
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I do not go to AA, there aren’t any meetings near me right now. I got this app to kind of supplement them in the meantime. Thank you for all your hel, I think reading everything it is better if I just work the holidays and avoid them altogether. I will take it one day at a time, but sometimes I can’t help but to dread the coming months. Thanks again 
Hey Kelsea I am right there with you. 25 days sober today. My family are drinkers as well and don’t understand me or my thoughts, however you don’t need to explain yourself to anyone. Just cruise through and the holidays will be over sooner than you think. I know its not easy. I’m here if you need to talk!
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BOUNDARIES are a must have, they defined where I start ,& end, these are the hardest things to have with family, but usually is the first place we have to start,,I believe in ya…. Much love & respect
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My family did that to me I just stayed in my room.
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Some of family and friends are not going to understand,I drank for 30 years since I was 12 and when I lost my wife and son and job I lost my mind I drank even more to the point That I was loosing my mind and soul like I was a empty vessel of a human and I finally gave up, I praid for help my mom helped me to go to detox,my father and brother thought of that being weak and having no will,in a way yes because finding AA in detox was the best thing I did because when reading the steps I have done them without even knowing by surrendering and asking God for help and giving up my will over to him because I couldn't do it on my own alcohol had a hold on me,you have to do it for yourself and nobody else just listen what you family say is there opinion and say a prayer for them and you and you will be ok,for now don't do any parties,and make meeting and listen
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I'll have similar issues this holiday season but only with 1 parent. My solution is spending Christmas eve rather than Christmas day when that parent won't be around. Doing day after Thanksgiving instead of the actual day. These workarounds fit my situation, but may not fita yours. Hopefully something similar can work for you. I think working on the holdays can be a good option. Maybe mail gifts home early to keep the spirit alive and have gifts mailed to you.
I hope some of this helps Kelsea. Again, you have time to plan it and find a solution. I've worked the holidays before as well. Maybe do something nice for yourself this year. Buy yourself something nice and hold it until Christmas. Something to mess with may help.
Try seeing if there are Zoom meetings near you as well.
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Staying sober is possible with the help of your higher power. Don’t drink and go to a meeting. I managed to stay sober for 24 years. The day my Father died, I pickedup a glass of red wine. I don’t know why. I wasn’t planning on it. It just happened. Its been 14 years since then and I’ve not been able to stay sober for more than 3 months at a time. I’ll have a drink now and then. I don’t get bombed. Some would call me a social drinker now. But I know the temptation to get bombed is always there.