I got out of rehab yesterday. It was the best thing that I’ve ever done for myself. I have been to rehab before, in 2014 and 2016, but wasn’t ready to totally surrender. Once I pick up, I am powerless over my disease. At rehab this time - digging deep into my childhood for underlying issues - I learned a pathway to forgiveness for my past since my divorce in 2016. Self-forgiveness is essential so that I can love myself. Because if I don’t love myself, I can’t stop using. And forgiveness and love for myself are in my subconscious. I use prayer and meditation to cement my self-forgiveness. It was incredibly emotional and exhaustive. But I am a changed person. I feel differently, and think differently. Leaving rehab yesterday morning, I went directly to a NA meeting. I went to another one later at night. Working the program and going to meetings are what this addict needs. My mantra going forward is: I’m done hurting myself. God bless and have a great Sunday.
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