I’m fairly new to sobriety, along with being fairly new to AA. I started going to meetings in March and more so recently have started going 3-5 times a week. I’ve also had a lot of change/stress in my life lately too. I am working with a sponsor. The reason I’m reaching out and posting is this: Why am I so hard on myself about missing a meeting or getting far too stressed about being committed to going?
I love the meetings, don’t get me wrong. But lately I feel like I just need to breath and instead of breathing I’m more so suffocating. Maybe all the feels of feels are coming in? I’m not sure.
Anyone relate? Any advice? Suggestions?
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You've been waaay better than I have at going to meetings. Like anything a little burnout is possible for a spell. Even with all the positivity and strength I've gotten from meetings, sometimes I'm not thinking about alcohol and I don't want to go where it's going to be the subject matter. I also think "booze brain" fully supports me in that decision though so there's that. I think your feeling is valid and you shouldn't feel guilt over it but keep at it. You're doing great.
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It’s your brain obsessing over something. When you were drinking it was the booze, when you quit, your mind is trying to compensate for the chemicals it wants. As an addict, our brains work different. It takes a bit to rebuild the “obsession” parts. Try to seek balance. Like a scale… too much on one side will tip it, gotta add or take out something to bring it back to level. And don’t beat yourself up or be too hard on yourself. It takes time to figure out sobriety.
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I know when I started I was retraining my brain. Get to the meetings as often as possible. Bring the body, and the mind will follow.
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Sometimes when we enter into something new, we push ourselves too hard to try and make sure we do it right. We lose focus on our overall health, which includes things other than constant meetings. Meetings may work for you, they didn’t for me, but don’t overdo it. Go to a few, as many as you feel you need to allow them to worn for you, then give yourself a rest from them. Add in maybe some exercise, healthy eating, reading, something else that gives you joy. If you’re not already doing any of those. Don’t burn yourself out on feeling like you have to attend tons of meetings every week. Rest is also important to recovery.
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Breathe Katie! Everything is ok. You are making your way and finding your balance. I’m such a “routine” guy. I’m like a robot sometimes lol. We do that because it gives us this fake sense of control. I had/still have similar issues. I panic when something throws me off schedule. It’s good for us to learn to become more flexible. It definitely stirs up the anxiety levels, but we are learning to deal with this without medicating ourselves. These are all good things. Just keep reminding yourself that this is a process. My advice is to breathe, pause, slow down, and smile
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Thanks everyone. Reminding myself of the positive or the good or the “give your $&@#£ to your HP” is not a quality I have. Learning and staying sober! All I can do.