Yesterday was rough. Had a "rage" panic attack. In partial to a breakup. But also I felt very out of control, mentally. I find these types of panic attacks can be very dark. It's so crazy how I couldn't really tell till it was over that I was spiraling mentally. Looking back at the attack there was so much fear and self hatred. But afterwards (hours later) I could think clearly and knew the thoughts during the attack where not my own. The thoughts where somehow fear talking. And I found clarity and a peace in an odd way after it all.
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Sometimes things like that happen, especially in high stress situations. Especially in early recovery as well. It opens us up to something that maybe we haven’t dealt with at all or in a while. Fear and self hatred can be common from others I’ve heard from who have dealt with this. But it’s good that after time, you were able to think more clear and could recognize that the thoughts weren’t truly yours! Reach out if you need to chat any
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