Progression To Nothing

I feel lost. For two years I have been working towards getting my family back after a stupid decision.

Last week was the first time my wife said she was excited for our future and wanted our family again it was the best week I’ve had in years with my family.

Sunday I went to have drinks at the pool with neighbors and came home blackout and said hurtful things I promised her I’d never say again. I was drunk and broke every safeguard rule and boundary I set in place to get my family back.

She says she is done with me, I am done with that version of me to. No drink is worth sacrificing myself or my family. I’m done but at the same time I feel lost, alone, defeated, a failure, robbed of all joy, and hopeless.

This photo is my family happy together just hours before I destroyed it.

I wish I had some wisdom that could just make everything better for you. But I don’t. The only think I can say is if you truly want to be free of the alcohol, get into a program and start the journey. It’s not always easy, and it takes a ton of work. But if you submit to the fact that you are powerless over addiction, and you can be truly honest with yourself, you can be free. Good luck buddy. I hope you find peace. There is an app that is free called “meeting guide” it tells you where all the meetings and times are in your area.

1 Like