Really upset. I ended a codependent relationship with a friend of mine yesterday. Every time I start doing well and sober, I get pulled into her grief stricken life. And I relapse on coors light. I gave her thousands of dollars to help her thru her struggles. I never ask in return. I just asked her to wish my 10 year old a happy birthday and she couldn’t even do that. So I cut ties yesterday and she’s mad pointing fingers because she has to face the fact that I ended it. Advise
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The simple thing I can say would be to not let her cause you difficulty. Sometimes when we cut someone out, especially another addict/alcoholic, and they see us getting better, they try to bring us down to their level. Can’t let that happen. Stay focused on you and your recovery.
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That is a tough thing to do, on both ends. It's self survival for you. You have to take care of you and your family. It also hurts to see a dear friend in trouble but you can not fix someone who is not ready. At this point I would say don't abandon them but only moral support. The other doesn't appear to be helping you or them. Take care of you or you both will go down. Reach out anytime I will always talk about anything sobriety
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If she is upset that you cut the friendship off that’s her issue not yours, If you decide to use her as a reason to pick up it’s on you not her. I think you absolutely did the right thing. She obviously is taking you for granted. What would it have taken for her to wish your child happy birthday. I believe that if you really want sobriety then just cut her out of your life. I had to make that decision and I honestly feel better. She will continue to drag you down. I am sorry if this seems harsh but I know in my case I have cut 40 year relationships because it was the best thing for me. Good luck.
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Let this be your codependency bottom. I have similar issues, so don’t take this as me preaching. I have a tendency to also give way too much in a friendship/relationship, and then get upset when it’s not reciprocated or taken for granted. I had to take responsibility that it’s just as much my fault/problem/issue as the other person. I’m looking to take help someone, and in return I have certain expectations. The other person is looking to be taken care of, but doesn’t want any strings attached. They get upset when they are expected to hold up to their end of the friendship, just as I get upset when they ultimately don’t. The other person is longing/craving for that unconditional love they never received. They’ll take take take, and then get upset when they are called out for being ungrateful. It’s a viscous cycle. We need to learn to love ourselves first, and set healthy boundaries. It’s difficult, but it’s a must if we want to have healthy relationships with our lovers, children, parents, siblings, friends, co-workers etc. I suggest therapy and workshops. If you are a member of a 12 step group, working the steps on a regular basis will definitely get you started. Hope you feel better soon 
❤🩹
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This is YOUR life, let her do her life. Plain and simple. You must be selfish and protect your sobriety journey. Someday maybe she will follow your lead…. But you always must come first. 
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If the friendship was toxic then you had to get away. Who cares about her "fingerpointing"? Go on with your life. Find new friends
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If that person uses drugs or alcohol you may want to consider attending ALANON. (I swore I would never go)
It is saving my rear right now. My partner abandoned my children and I in pursuit of her disease. Take care of yourself first, and remember that without your sobriety your not able to help anyone even yourself. Sobriety comes first.
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Thank you! I’m over the brunt of the emotions and back to nurturing the winner friendships I had in place. I learned my lesson
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Thanks for your honesty it really helps me. I too recently broke up with my girlfriend after finding out she’s bisexual. The only problem I had with it is that she wasn’t upfront with me in the beginning and I fell in love with her after 6 months of dating. If she was honest with me in the beginning I could have guarded my heart and I would have been able to make a decision on our relationship. It’s not that she likes women also but I honestly pray the best for her and hopefully she and I will somehow be friends because she’s my neighbor. She definitely broke my heart. I hope you have peace and pray the very best for you.
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This has happened with some of my friends over and over. I’ve always been the giver and always get hurt by them. I shut one off again 2 weeks ago and felt pretty bad about it. But I have come to see that honestly I really felt alone even when surrounded by them. Hang in there.