Really wish I didn't drink. I don't even enjoy it anymore.
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Yep been there done that! Thanks for sharing. Thatās one of the many reasons I quit. Youāre on your way!
Are you working the steps with a sponsor?
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Hi Deanna!
You are not alone in that thought! I remind myself of the lack of enjoyment while sober often and it has really helped me on my sobriety journey. I will follow that statement up with things that I DO enjoy to do instead and if the time and space exists, I will follow through with something on that list. Create positivity in a place that is negative. Iām proud of you for being on this journey and sharing. 
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This short phrase changed my life 2 years ago. Woman from AA said to me whole I was in a detox center:
"John, you NEVER HAVE TO DRINK AGAIN. There is a beautiful world waiting for you, if you have the b**s to go grab it."
I found my b**ls, and grabbed it.
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Yeah, at some point it stopped working for me also.
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My experiences your expressing that you didnāt enjoy it. That is your step one admitting. Have you tried to work a 12 step program?
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Yeah that poison is just not good to drink, period. It's sad how much publicity it gets as being a social lubricant or stress relief option, and I'm glad to finally know those are just illusions caused by marketers and good intentioned folks.
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Sounds like you're ready. You can do it!
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There is a bottom below the bottom you know
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I understand
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It stopped āworkingā for me, too. But I kept going, because I didnāt feel like there was another way that I could live. I was terrified of living without that armor that I believed alcohol gave me, a shield from all the things I was afraid to face. You are stronger than you know, and there is a different life waiting for you, free from this thing, that you probably once loved, but no longer feels good - at all. Go to a meeting, and ask for help. You donāt have to figure this out alone, or stop drinking forever, right now. You know this isnāt working, so try something new. You are worth it! 
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I was like thar seems like ages ago hang in there
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How are you feeling today Deanna
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Same for me. I thought it would cure my loneliness. But it just made things worse. So I try every day to find something to do.
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I tried AA a few times years ago but it wasn't for me. I have thought about Maybe trying online meetings. I was just never comfortable sitting in the rooms.
I am doing okay. I haven't drank in 2 days. Going to try for another sober night again tonight. I have been drinking alone for so long and it's just a bad habit that needs to be broken.
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Iām so proud of you that is the first step surrender. How do you feel today? ļæ¼
AA isn't the only way. I hated AA. I was humiliated by 2 different groups in front of everyone. It works for some, not me. When you're ready inside you can do it. If you want, message me, or anyone else can too. I'm happy to share.
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Unfortunately I have been up all night taking care of my sick son. Another reason to be grateful for not drinking. I was able to be there for him 100%. I'm tired today but feeling more positive. As I get older, drinking is definitely getting less enjoyable.
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U done greatness there Momš
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