Mind is all over a place. I had 10 and half months sober and relapsed over a month ago. The relapse was really bad, got out of rehab yesterday and now have to turn myself into the cops tomorrow morning. Ill face my mess and clean it up. Just so much self disappointment, sadness right now. Not going to drink, i dont want alcohol at all.
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Hang in there man. All this is temporary. I’ve been there too and it suck’s but you will prevail
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Stay strong Adam. Keep moving forward. Put your sobriety first always and things get better one day at a time.
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Unfortunately it happens, “ I know all too well” , It’s natural to feel all the feelings your feeling but where is that going to get you? “ No where but wanting to relapse again. Now it’s time to move on and keep going forward. You can do this! 
that’s huge that you reached out!
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This is going to be a hard day it too shall pass
We are with you. Please check in with us and let us know how you’re doing.