I’m so mad at myself and hurt and scared. I really got out of hand last night. Drunk texting someone I should’ve left in my past. And then he shows up at my door. We weren’t intimate but I swear it feels like he’s the devil himself when he’s around. He has no job, always broke but always off KT, Alcohol or Pills and I wanted to start the month off sober and I got drunk anyway. Im alone with just my daugher and I do this out of boredom 
. I don’t smoke weed cause it makes me more anxious now and that isnt my problem. It’s alcohol. I was on this app before but I didnt feel like I had enough people to talk too. Its like I need constabd conversation 
. I’m sorry 
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You've relapsed and acknowledge what you did. Now let's move forward. Get to a meeting in person if you can and if not try online. I can be someone you can talk to. Feel free to message me.
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Thank you
You’re going to be ok, and you can choose to never have to feel this way again. I remember the anxiety from drunk texting and bad decisions. Even still it tries to poke back in, like “remember that dumb thing you did last winter?” I promise that remorseful voice gets quieter without the alcohol.
It’s crazy how mentally harmful one day, or one night can be. So know that the healing also starts with just one day. You can do it! Reach out anytime you need to talk.
You recognize boredom as a trigger. What can you do differently to avoid that? Ghost the loser and let's get back on track! Forgive yourself but don't forget how bad it feels after a drunk. You are worth it and your daughter deserves it. Praying for you
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