After 90 days without my DOC, I thought I could use it responsibly again. The last two weeks going back to it have been hard. I’ve lost the peace I found in sobriety. Now I’m just struggling again.
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The good news is, you are here, posting up, being honest and have another chance to start over. Chin up Jessa.
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Thank you Clay
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You are here, with us. Learning that relapse is often part of the journey to sobriety is one of the harder things to not just learn, but accept. Keep on posting and try not to beat yourself up too much.
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Pick yourself up...dust yourself off...and keep on going without looking back..u can do it...all of us are right here cheering u on every step of the way...
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Get it back, it's want you want right? Those 90 days in sobriety are still a part of your life and story. Draw from those days, and realize you don't want to do your DOC period. Not 'responsibly', or recklessly. I say that to you and to myself. You can do this I believe in you.
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Thank you Matt!
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That’s great advice, thank you Joshua
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Jessa, sorry you are struggling. I was a chronic relapser for way too long. But I believe we can learn from our mistakes and relapses. I asked myself, what did I do wrong or not enough of? What could I have done differently?
The truth always comes to light. Then I have the choice of doing something that aligns me with what I truly want, or not😊
I’m here if you want to talk
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Thank you Jes 🩷
Thanks Danny!
Are you going to outpatient treatment at all or meeting?
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I was going to a lot of meetings that rlly helped but I recently started school again and got a new job and I’m having a hard time finding time for meetings
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Lessened learned. Make your sobriety a priority so you don’t lose all the gains you made. Don’t get down on yourself. It’s a learning process, and now you know
I've convinced myself that I could handle drinking again responsibly 7 times in the last 16 years. First 3 times it was heavy relapses that lasted for a few months each. Then gradually I started getting over the "party" life, and living down south is like a big party year round. Celebrations, festivals, Mardi Gras itself shut the whole state down. I would go periods of not drinking, never longer than a year at a time. Ended up separated from my ex wife, moved myself right into bad situation after bad situation with drinks and drugs. This last time, was probably the hardest and easiest walk back into sobriety. Drinking almost caused an unrepairable Crack in my current relationship. That was 2 sided, but then just like that we both quit drinking. Her first, I followed after. I remember the half drank Miller Lite Tall boy sitting on my table for almost 2 days. That last drink, something about it made me gag, and it tasted horrible. Here @marissa398757 and I are, almost 3 and a half years sober
I know everyone's story is different with similar undertones. But I know for a fact, getting back on the wagon and staying on that wagon is and was the best choice anyone can make. Choose your friends wisely, be the type of person you want to attract in your life, face yourself in the mirror and tell yourself how much you love yourself, and keep digging deep to fight that struggle. From one "lost cause to another", you're not lost, you just stepped off you path momentarily
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Matthew, thank you for sharing your story. I appreciate the advice
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My real advice, you can not ever in your life use your DOC in a responsible matter. It is impossible. No matter how hard you try to convince yourself. We don't come equipped with a functional on/off switch, so cut the power and put a padlock on it and throw away the key
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