I relapsed twice once after 6 months once after a year. Your not a perfect person. Pick yourself up and get back on the wagon. You can do this! It’s just a speed bump on your road!
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The comeback is stronger then the setback. Do something different this time
Your friends and family don’t need answers.. it’s your recovery and I have had to start over many times. Sometimes you just to be reminded why you are choosing a sober life.. and unfortunately that reminder can be a relapse.. I know it’s hard to fight off the shame and guilt.. my sponsor always tells me to write down 20 things I am grateful for when I have those feelings.. it actually helps redirect me to the positive..
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Giselle. Don't be hard on yourself, dust yourself off and climb again. YOU don't need to explain to anyone. You got this..
I am so sorry you are feeling guilt and shame is 100% a “side effect” of the disease. Guilt is something we create ourself usually due to regret. I have relapsed many times and the feelings that come with that really suck and it makes me want to drink more but I remind myself it’s the disease tricking me. I wish I could remove those negative feelings you were or may still be having. As far as family and friends, there only job is to support you if you ask them for it. Recovery is a personal journey. Stay strong in your heart and mind. You got this 
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It could be any one of us. If meetings help you, go back to them. If it helps to talk to the folks here, then do that. What helped you a year ago to stay focused on your recovery? I agree with what a few have said, only another addict or alcoholic can understand. Family and friends mean well, and want the best for you, but do not really get it. You can do this. Pull up the bootstraps, get back up on your horse, and onto your recovery trail. You have much support right here.
Unfortunately, relapse is part of recovery and it does happen. Forgive yourself. I was sober for 10 years and relapsed. But I’ve been sober for over a year now! It’s reported that cravings last 2-5 minutes. It’s when we add fuel to the flames or feed the beast with negative thoughts and rationalizing that linger. That’s when relapse actually begins. Remember, relapse begins way before you pick up your first drink or drug. It’s a thinking process that is followed by the behavior to then use. It takes practice to rewire our thinking and sometimes we slip. Put layers of protection in your way to keep yourself on the right path. Self care is so important! Go to meetings, meet up with friends, exercise, eat healthily, take small frequent breaks if work is demanding, stay away/minimize triggers, separate yourself from whatever is overwhelming you when you need to. We all need to take a breather now and then! Mindfulness has been helpful form me. Yoga and meditation works for so many as well!
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Don’t beat yourself up. Progress not perfection.
The relapse isn't the important part. Going back to what made you successful is. Do not stay in that space of guilt and shame. We didn't get to be addicts and alcohlics because we were perfect.
Giselle are you ok!