I was Sober a few years back for a few years… I took the suggestions of 90 in 90 and no romantic entanglements for the first year… I learned a lot back then and was chairing meetings and very active in my home group and had even started sponsoring new comers… what is the experience, strength, and hope from the community
? Is it necessary for me to start anew regarding relationships and taking a year before beginning a new one?
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I vote yes. I tried after 6 months of sobriety with other sober individuals and it was disastrous. I feel the full year has served me better but it is certainly person to person.
Good luck
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I agree with the yes. I think you will know when you are ready. Background, separated for over a year, sober for 2 years, Divorce is in the process. I have had lady friends that have talked to but nothing serious. I tried to start a relationship with an old friend that was newly sober and it went really bad. In the end, my sobriety was in danger. I may feel like I am ready to move forward but I have to make sure the other person is too. Stay strong and listen to that little voice in the back of you mind. Whelp, that is my experience.
I feel what everyone is saying. I def will piggy back of the yes. I've had relationships in the past when I was early In sobriety. They ended up taking to much of my energy and time. I realized that all that time I was spending on the relationship equaled out to the time I took away from myself to find who I was and the healing and learning I needed to do.
Being lonely and being alone are different things. For me m, Finding som one as a friend who share common values is almost better than finding someone to love and fill the void.
I dunno if I have much to add.
I'm an introvert, a serious introvert, so it's difficult for me to be open with someone until I feel I can trust them. Being in fresh sobriety I remember the pink cloud where I was full of hope and had expectations. Ya, it didn't work out very well.
What I learned was that I needed to continue working on myself first before I inflicting myself on others.
You need to change the way you think. The book by Gary John Bishop called UNF!#*! YOURSELF is what jump-started my confidence in recovery.
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I don’t think everyone is understanding what I’m saying… I’m. Not entirely new to recovery… I’m coming back… if my addiction continues where I left it; logic would be that my recovery continues where I left it… it’s not like I somehow unlearned recovery.
I’m newly sober but for me, if I relapse then I’m going back to Step 1 because I obviously missed something.
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