I just wanted to share a couple of resources, since different strokes work for different folks.
A fairly quick background, I fell from 3 stories in 2001, breaking the thin bone on the bottom side of my pelvis, rebreaking my tabula and herniation a disc. I was lucky, as though I landed in the grass, it was a below freezing day, in January. Two years later I had a skiing accident at approx 70mph when I hit a jump unintentionally and soared about 70 yard through the air, landing on a patch of ice in Big Bear, CA. I have been in discomfort since and in 2009 the discomfort turned to pain. Touching it, I lived life rather wrecklessly until at 41 y/o the pain was too much and I began shooting dope. 2 months in, 1 OD and seeing a friend OD, needing 9 hits of Narcan to survive, I continued... until it came time to call me kids and my conscience says "WTH, WHY CALL WHEN YOU ARE KILLING YOURSELF?" I called the VA and demanded rehab. There I was introduced back to AA/NA as well as SMART Recovery. If you have not heard of smart recovery and you are prone to relapse I highly suggest it. They have a very psychological approach that to me is perfect for those who struggle even with going to aa/na.
When I completed rehab I felt I needed more than those three offerings. Being raised in a solid Christian home I felt I needed more of a spiritual ground. Especially since my pain is constant, I have trouble working full-time which has been very tough on my pride, and spiritually I felt rather lost over the last 10 years. Then I was introduced to Celebrate Recovery. Both of these formats have apps. You can attend meetings online which is sometimes my only option as sitting is very painful. You can also use the apps to find meetings near you, almost anywhere in the US.
Here in North Texas, there is also Milk and Whiskey. Milk and whiskey is another format I really like. For me Celebrate Recovery is essential. I am not sure I would be alive were it not for CR.
If there are any veterans reading this, and you need help, whether it is an ear to listen, advice, motivation or just further help with resources and navigating the VA, disability, Social Security, Etc, please message me. I would be honored to help and to share the knowledge I have gained as well as my story.
If you struggle with opioids and are reading this, the same goes. I was in Louisiana when I reached out to the VA. It was fall of 2021 and given my disability I decided to help my little brother in the hurricane relief efforts. With no sound tailbone or lumbar spine I was limited on what I could do but knew that serving others would help with my depression. After a few weeks that idea went bust and I returned to Texas , after 3 years, where I consider home and where my children reside. As an open book, everyone close to me knows my story in and out. My brother-in-law who struggled his entire adult life with opioid addiction heard that I was going to rehab and ask me if I would attend NA with him. On a Wednesday and late October, we headed to a meeting. The meeting was canceled due to covid. We then headed to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting but it turned out it was in Spanish. So we headed to the other AA. Austin Avenue, a popular bar in Plano, and watched the Mavericks win as I drink a Sprite and he drank a Dr Pepper. That Sunday, Nick was found dead in his car. He had scored some h and was trying to trade it for some ice. When he got no reply, I guess he decided it was time. Maybe not but I knew him very well. I don't think he intended to live through that shot, perhaps he did. My point is, when is enough enough? If you are on the fence, let this be a lesson. Fentanyl don't play. I was a user for barely two months out in Tennessee. I saw one girl overdose that I barely knew. Her friends told me to put her in a ditch. Praise God I was raised better than that. After that she overdosed another three times before I left Tennessee. Once again in my company. I spent 19 days in jail for saving her life the first time and nearly went to jail the second time. I narrowly escaped a felony charge at 41 years old. Being a veteran and a proponent of the right to bear arms, I took this very seriously. I myself overdosed one time, not really caring much as I was ready to end it too. Within a week I had even forgotten that I OD'd. This coupled with missing and being concerned for my children is what saved my life. Celebrate Recovery, SMART Recovery, AA and NA have helped me to continue to live and even thrive. I am no better than the next woman or man, you can do it. God has equipped us all with the ability to live abundantly in spirit if nothing else. I love you all and pray daily for each and every one of you!
