Retiring today. 33 years of addiction is enough for me

Recovery
#1

Retiring today. 33 years of addiction is enough for me. My life has become unmanageable and I'm insane I keep planning on not spending all my money but end up doing it. Then I would resort to criminal ways to get high even tho I tell myself I'm not goin to. No matter what I plan or think the results are the same. In my long history of addiction crack cocaine has been here since the beginning and is still here beating me down destroying my life 1200$ to 2000$ a week habit. I have had many attempts to stop I need to try harder. I am powerless over it. But am going to to ask Allah (g-d) for strength and forgiveness. And am going to start NA

5 Likes
#2

Good for you Kenny! Jump into NA wholeheartedly. Your addiction will give you 100 reasons why it’s lame, the people are fake, it’s a cult, everyone is talking about you, etc. Don’t listen to it. Do what they suggest, self-identify as a newcomer, come to meetings early and stay afterwards to fellowship. If we stay with the herd, we won’t get picked off by the roaring Lion of our disease. That was my DoC also, and I finally found recovery in NA by totally surrendering. You can do it.

1 Like
#3

Congrats dude! Happy for ya

#4

Crack is whack is a very familiar phrase for me. I first got clean and sober in 1989. I had a friend named Kenny who I used to party with. I had to check out your profile pic and see if maybe you were him. I hope he found help. Glad you’re here brother. What you described in your post is the sad reality of crack. NA is waiting for you. There are recovering crack heads. It’s very possible. You gotta dig deep bro and go after recovery just as hard as you go after crack. You can do it

#5

Welcome home, Kenny. Glad to have you in the fam. If you're anything like me, then you've spent all these years in active addiction facing turmoil, diversity and chaos. It's been hard, and you've survived some bad stuff. But it's also made you tough, so keep surviving and when the going gets tough, use what you've got, and GET TOUGHER. You've got this, because you know you ain't got this and you know Who does. Love ya, bro.