So i had to meet with my longtime SA therapist today; first time since my total collapse and relapse. She saw me last Tuesday at my absolute worst and i was both extremely relieved to have our appointment upcoming, and fcking terrified to face her and her concern.
I don't know why i was scared, i guess the disappointment factored in heavy. She even asked me 'what are you afraid of?' 'why are you terrified?'
It felt so great to get everything off my chest about the past week, about the detox, about the healing, and about me getting my head out of my ase and looking forwards not backwards.
It was a very raw session, but i also felt proud of the amount of work I've put in, in just 6 days (detox included). I'm even stunned! It's as if time had stretched.
I am so grateful to be on the other side of it, with my head clear, and looking forward to keeping putting in the grueling work that's needed.
I hope that you all are doing alright out there, please reach out if you'd like some inspiration.
-Arc
