I don’t crave butterflies the way I used to.
I crave safety.
Not the kind that cages me.. the kind that steadies me. The kind that doesn’t disappear when things get uncomfortable. The kind that doesn’t need chaos to feel alive.
I used to confuse intensity with connection. If it was loud, passionate, urgent… I thought it meant it was real. But real doesn’t have to feel like a fire alarm.
Real can feel like calm.
I don’t want to guess where I stand anymore. I don’t want to decode energy or chase reassurance. I want clarity. I want words that match actions. I want someone who doesn’t make me question my worth just because they’re uncertain about theirs.
And more than that.. my happiness no longer hinges on being chosen. I don’t need external validation to feel whole. I’ve done the work of meeting myself in the quiet. I’ve learned how to sit with my own loneliness without abandoning myself to escape it.
I want to feel seen, slowly. Safely. And have it stay.
I want a love that doesn’t spike my nervous system. A love that feels like coming home, not surviving a storm.
I’ve done chaos. I’ve done adrenaline. I’ve done proving.
Now I choose steady.
Not because I’m boring.
But because I’m healed enough to know the difference.
