So. I parted ways with my AA sponsor today. I don’t think we were a good fit for each other. He didn’t respect the fact that I work, have mandated appointments, and other commitments in my life. My mental health is just as important to me as my sobriety. I think they go hand in hand. He didn’t appreciate that I had to rush my councilor to call him at our appointed time. He chastised me and made me feel like crud for doing what I knew what was right. I will not tolerate that. I will continue studying and learning and seal out a new sponsor.
7 Likes
You take care of you the best way you know is right. Mental health does go hand in hand with one’s sobriety I think.
3 Likes
Glad you’re taking care of you!!!
1 Like
We need to be chemically balanced to help us stay on the beam too, my friend. Being chemically balanced and psychiatrically well enough are important for us to grasp this program. The age of modern psychiatric medicine has helped reduce the amount of people “who are mentally incapable of grasping this simple program”…
1 Like
Sounds like you made the right decision. You don’t need anyone making you feel bad for doing what you know is right for you. Find a new sponsor who supports you and is a positive influence.
Right decision 
In my experience, I had no idea what I needed. A sponsor was crucial for me, and still is, but especially early on.
A good sponsor will encourage you to put your sobriety first so that everything else is first class.
Only you know what kind of sponsor you need. But don’t forget, we have a disease that lies to us in our own voice. At times we’re unable to differentiate the true from the false.
Make sure you find a new one ASAP! Good luck with everything and have the best Sunday ever!
2 Likes
Good call Roy….. you’ll find someone that’s a fit 
1 Like
In my experience, my sponsor was not my friend. He was a sober man who was willing to be honest with me about my disease. I definitely didn't always like what he had to say, but I understood that he was always trying to help me. This man was unpaid for the hours and hours of his life that he dedicated to helping me. With that being said, I had to make my sobriety my priority, especially early on. I was scatter-brained, my brain and thoughts were still befogged from my alcoholism. With that being said, having a sponsor is not a lifelong commitment. My first "sponsor" had a month more of sobriety than I had, hadn't worked the steps, and wasn't taking me through the steps. Find someone who is talking about their higher power, who has gone through the steps, and who is willing to take you through the book and the steps. You're also going to have to remain open-minded and willing to change. If I hadn't, I wouldn't be here right now.
1 Like
"I had no idea what I needed" either!! But I didn't know that early on. I still had an alcoholic mind, and my thinking was skewed. I completely agree with you here!!
1 Like
I had a pretty crappy sponsor for a while. They were very hit or miss. Only any a couple more months sober. I ended up just separating with them. I knew I needed to focus on my mental health more then my recovery for a good chunk of time. I relate to your post. Sometimes you gotta do whats best for you! It doesn’t mean you won’t ever have one in the future!!
1 Like