422 days without alcohol and still so unhealthy...
I've made huge improvements in my health and welbeing, and love sobriety, but I have also continued some core unhealthy thoughts and behaviors. Some I and just beginning to understand and acknowledge.
Even in sobriety, I have continued to harm the relationships most importantmto me.
So much work to do on myself.
Does anyone relate?
It’s a process Chrs. We all go thru the ups and downs of sobriety but you’ll come out on top 
You still have an alcoholic mind. I went through the exact same thing. What brought me true freedom was AA, and working the 12 step program of action. I walk a free man today, and my unhealthy thoughts and behaviors have all but disappeared. I'm coming up on 2 years of sobriety on 9/11/24, and I have rebuilt my shredded relationships, and beginning new beautiful ones! I hope that you've experienced and caused enough pain to be willing, open-minded, and teachable. AA works for all those who work it! Praying for you, brother!
Congrats on 422!!! Yes, I totally relate! Abstained from drugs and alcohol for about 25 years. During that time my disease found other ways to destroy my life. To the point where I picked up alcohol and weed after 25 years of nothing. Anyways, I’m 3 years into recovery now. I echo Andrew’s words…get to work brother. The program of AA is working for me ODAAT
I'm probably not going to get a lot of love here for saying this, but I don't think my abuse of alcohol has been the core issue for me. I believe abusing alcohol was a response to, and a result of my core struggles.
Not drinking has been relatively easy once I got through the initial change.
What I believe I need to work on is further understanding the complex trauma I experienced in my youth. I need to continue to recognize its face in adulthood while learning healthy ways to respond.
I need to continue with my therapist, not necessarily an AA group.
Tell me otherwise, as I am genuinely interested.
Thanks, I plan to continue and come out on top!
Nothing but love for you my brother. I actually agree with you. As I said, I was able to not drink for 25 years. Stopping didn’t heal me. Alcohol and substances are just a symptom. In fact, I just found alternative destructive ways to avoid dealing with myself. Yes, working thru the 12 steps of AA helped me get to the bottom of understanding me and my problems, but I needed a lot of therapy along the way…not to mention some great podcasts and YouTube videos. Regardless, don’t drink and continue to work on healing yourself
That's a good point. I can imagine periods in my past where I would have used progress in mental health and other areas as 'logic' for trying out drinking again.
That is not where I am at right now, but thanks for encouraging me to keep that awareness.
So much personal work to continue for myself. Complex trauma from childhood is something that has been brought to my attention lately.
It's real for me and continues to impact as an adult. It's hard at times to aknowlege the impact and reality as I know so many have gone through so much more and significantly worse than I did.
Good luck brother
Congratulations on 442 days sober Chrs. One day at a time we do recover as long as we continue to put the work in we continue to work on what needs to be worked on. Thank you so much for sharing. God bless you